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Madonna, Seeking Relevance, Teams Up with Pop Fad Sam Smith to Get “Vulgar,” Barely An Actual Idea of a Song for the Dance Floor

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You’ve got to be kidding.

Madonna, almost 65 years old, is desperate for relevance.

So she teamed up with a bloated waterbug of a contemporary pop star, Sam Smith, and together they’ve produced a short dance track that just doesn’t live up to its name.

“Vulgar” sounds like a parody of a record Madonna would make from the 90s. The record which lasts just two minutes and thirty five seconds sounds like it’s sampling itself with beats found in a flea market.

Of course, the main audience for the single is the dance floor, where camp is welcome. Otherwise, the only reason for this record is so Smith and Madonna can have a lyric video that reads “S&M.”

Will “Vulgar” be a hit? This weekend, yes. And then it will fade into the dust of all unfinished records, a sample in the middle of dance mixes of other records. Its part is bigger than its whole.

Did I mention that this brief encounter of recycled disco has no less than seven authors including the two singers? Seven! Madonna likely takes 50%. Smith 25%, and the other five split the rest. And no one can ever boast they “wrote” anything original. It’s 2023.

Directors Guild Settlement in Jeopardy? Many Union Members Including “Seinfeld” Director Saying They’re Voting No on Deal with Studios

Will the the Directors Guild deal with the movie studios go through this weekend?

Many members of the DGA are saying on Twitter they are voting no, in solidarity with the striking Writers Guild. They also want to see what kind of deal SAG-AFTRA will make, or if they will strike. SAG-AFTRA members voted to approve a strike a few days ago. Their deal is up on June 30th.

One of the dissenters, who even made a video, is Larry Charles, famed director of “Seinfeld,” “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” and “Borat.” Another is Duncan Jones, son of late singer David Bowie, who directed “Moon” with Sam Rockwell and ‘Mute” with Alexander Skarsgard.

Jones wrote on Twitter: “I’d vote to NOT accept the DGA deal struck, and request that our guild’s acceptance of what was negotiated is conditional on the WGA and SAG deals are worked out first as well.”

Jones isn’t alone. There are threads all over Twitter from DGA members recommending a no vote. TV writer and producer Liz Benjamin notes: “Wow reading a lot of posts and talking to #DGA friends — seems possible the membership will reject the deal. Wouldn’t that be an interesting wrench for the #AMPTP?”

Steven DeKnight, with a long resume of directing, Tweeted: “I just voted NO on the 2023-2026 DGA Basic Agreement and Freelance Live & Tape Television Agreement Ratification ballot. I strongly urge all DGA members to do the same. This isn’t the time to accept table scraps and call them historic. Stand together. Stand Union Strong.”

Joe Russo (not Avengers, plenty of credits) says: “I don’t mean to be hyperbolic when I say the DGA negotiating committee seems to have given away the future of the entertainment industry when it comes to Artificial Intelligence and streaming transparency in exchange for clawing back a few creative TV rights from showrunners.”

Of course, there are always dissenters. The DGA technically approved the deal on June 7th pending ratification. But the responses, insiders say, indicate a lot of unhappiness, especially about the now dreaded and ubiquitous “AI.”

Stay tuned…any thoughts please email me at showbiz411@gmail.com

Pat Robertson is Dead at 93: A Force in Evangelical Republican Media Failed in Run for President 1988

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Pat Robertson is dead.

The 93 year old was perhaps the most famous Evangelical Christian ever on television. He tried to translate that popularity into politics as a very right wing Republican. In 1988, he even tried to run for President, but failed.

But he was no failure. Robertson’s decades-long run on his syndicated show, “The 700 Club,” is proof of that. There wasn’t a time before appointment TV that you didn’t flip past his talking head on the Christian Broadcasting Network. He was a constant presence until not that long ago, and it meant so much to a lot of people (and, conversely, nothing to the same amount of people).

His career instincts paid off for Robertson. A former Baptist minister, his net worth is estimated at around $100 million.

Sex in Another City: Sarah Jessica Parker, Matthew Broderick Taking Neil Simon’s “Plaza Suite” to London’s West End Next Winter

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London is about to get a taste of some sex in the city.

Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick are taking their Broadway production of Neil Simon’s “Plaza Suite” to the West End.

Their production, directed by John Benjamin Hickey, will open on January 15, 2024 and play through the end of March.

The show was a big commercial hit in New York, finally getting a sold out run after being postponed because of the pandemic.

Parker will be making her West End debut. Broderick was already there in 2019 with “The Starry Messenger.”

On Parker’s famous TV show, her character’s fictional best friend (that’s Carrie and Samantha) has been living in London. Maybe she — Samantha — will go to opening night!

Emmy Winning “General Hospital” Actress Sarah Joy Brown Accuses James Bond Film Director of Sexual Assault in Emotional Twitter Spaces (UPDATED)

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UPDATED 6/9/23 8PM–Sarah Joy Brown is known to soap opera audiences for playing two roles, at different times, on ABC’s “General Hospital.” She won three Daytime Emmy Awards for her work (and received four other nominations).

Tonight on a Twitter Spaces, she has accused Martin Campbell, director of two James Bond movies (“Casino Royale” and “Golden Eye”), of sexual assault. It’s not rape. But she says Campbell, directing her on an ABC pilot in 2003 called “10 to 8,” violently shoved his tongue down her throat after requesting to see her privately when her work was done on the show. It left her shaken to her core.

Brown had recently left ABC’s “General Hospital” for the first time after winning her Emmy awards. She says she told her father as soon as it happened, and told her manager as well. The manager, a woman, advised her not to say anything. The pilot, “10 to 8,” went to series with Brown in a recurring role but was cancelled after 8 episodes. Brown worked on other soaps, and movies and eventually returned to “General Hospital” in a new role.

Brown also says she was “gaslit more than once” by former CBS chief Leslie Moonves. (That’s for another story.)

The actress also says that after she began talking her claim during the #MeToo movement she has not worked at all since 2018 except for a couple of freebies.

Campbell’s other credits include two “Zorro” movies and “The Green Lantern.” I’ve emailed Campbell’s attorney and will report any statement from him or the actor as soon as possible.

UPDATE I spoke to Brown this evening. I asked her why she didn’t report this incident right away. She wound up holding off until she returned to “General Hospital” a second time.

“I thought back, why didn’t I kick him in the balls? Because you’re stunned. The first thought that goes through your mind is, My career is over. One way or another, this man is going to hurt me.”

This happened long before Harvey Weinstein’s victims spoke up and told their stories about careers wrecked after their violent encounters with the movie mogul. “Everyone told me just to move on and not let it capsize my career,” Brown explains.

This sounds not different from what Weinstein’s victims said when they finally spoke up. Even Brown didn’t quite believe the stories she started hearing about Weinstein. “I thought if he was actually a rapist he wouldn’t be working at his capacity. But I was at the women’s march in 2017 through Hollywood. And there was a big billboard of Martin Campbell’s new movie. I had to go home.”

Brown spoke to Ronan Farrow at the time, about her dealings with Les Moonves. “CBS reached out to me and I provided them with information,” she tells me. But she didn’t tell Farrow about Campbell. “I told him I had a story, and met with Ronan’s producer. I detailed everything for him.” But nothing came of it. He didn’t have the resources for it. “I was disappointed.”

(More on Moonves later. Brown is a tremendous font of information about the sexual abuse of actresses in Hollywood.)

What made Brown speak up now? “Seeing that Clive Owen would take a role and Daisy Ridley, in a new movie directed by Campbell. And this was after I’d already spoken up about what happened on Twitter. I couldn’t believe it, particularly after #MeToo and everything that happened. It really stinks.”

What does Brown want now? “I’m not interested in suing. I want Martin to retire. I want women to know who these men are who think they can take women like me and treat us like we are nothing.”

Book publishers take note: Sarah Joy Brown has a great story to tell, maybe better than Rose McGowan. She could crack Hollywood wide open.

Broadway Shows in Peril Because of Air Quality: “Camelot,” “Hamilton” Cancel, Shakespeare in the Park off Until Improvement

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The scary air situation in New York City has hit Broadway and theater performances.

Both “Camelot” and “Hamilton” cancelled tonight’s shows because of the hazardous air quality. Shakespeare in the Park was supposed to start free performances tonight but has postponed until Saturday.

Jodie Comer, star of the one woman show, “Prima Facie,” stopped today’s matinee after ten minutes because she said she couldn’t breathe.

The Vineyard Theater cancelled tonight’s performance as well. Other theaters may be making last minute decisions.

One thing about the older New York house: they are porous. Hazardous air can seep in easily. It’s more important to protect casts and crews.

Woody Allen’s Great New “Coup de Chance” Likely Headed to Venice Film Festival (See Trailer)

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The word I got at the Cannes Film Festival opening: Woody Allen’s “Coup de Chance” is likely headed to the Venice Film Festival at the end of August.

This terrific new murder-drama is apparently high on the list for Venice director Alberto Barrera as much as said so, according to my spies, at the Cannes opening night private dinner.

Very excited by this news was actor Melvil Poupaud, who is very much the lead in the clever “Coup de Chance.” He was in Cannes because he’s French and he has a small part in “Jeanne duBarry.”

I was lucky enough to see “Coup de Chance” in April (here’s my column). It’s one of Woody Allen’s best creations. So far it has a French distributor, but it must have a theatrical release in the US this fall. Audiences will love it.

Johnny Depp Cannes Opener “Jeanne du Barry” Goes to Straight-to-Video Distributor Vertical Entertainment

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The short story here is: no one really wanted “Jeanne duBarry,” the 2023 Cannes opener.

Starring Johnny Depp and the film’s director, Maiwenn, “Jeanne duBarry” is a period piece full of great costumes and sets, but lacking everything else. Depp looks like a waxen vampire. Maiwenn could actually be the child of Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler.

The film is well composed, but the screenplay and acting are strike outs. At Cannes it was opening night. Everyone likes to applaud a celebrity. But Depp was out of his depth.

The lucky winner for distribution is Vertical Entertainment, a company determined not to buy anything of value. Their whole resume is filled with straight to video B list offerings you have never heard of.

After the opening screening, the Festival gave a terrific dinner at the Hotel Carlton to celebrate its renovation. Lots of stars came including Michael Douglas and Helen Mirren, plus Maiwenn and a popular French actor, Melvil Poupaud. Depp, however, never showed.

The next day a press conference was scheduled for 12:15pm. The press room was full and all of the cast and the director of “Jeanne duBarry” arrived on time. But Depp was 42 minutes late. His excuse was he got stuck in traffic. (Snark: I said, yeah, in Nice, where he just woke up.)

So good luck to Vertical. Johnny may be horizontal when they need him. And let’s get this out of the way now: there are NO Oscars involved here. None. Zero. Please. Let’s not get into that game.

Ratings: Maddow, O’Donnell Eat Hannity-Ingraham Ratings Lunch Monday Night Giving MSNBC a Win Over Fox

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While CNN is in a freefall and chaos, MSNBC rules the day.

On Monday Rachel Maddow and Lawrence O’Donnell soundly beat Fox News’s Sean Hannity and Laura Ingraham between 9 and 11pm.

At 8pm, MSNBC’s Chris Hayes came very close to Fox’s former Tucker Carlson hour.

And that gave MSNBC the win for the night.

And CNN? It was off trailing behind, having lost so many viewers who were angry over the Trump Town Hall and a year of trying to make the former world news leader into a pale reminder of Fox.

MSNBC’s success has been because they had a focus, a vision, and stuck to it, building their audience. CNN — which officially fired Chris Licht this morning — is adrift and in turmoil. It will take a long time to right their ship.

Meanwhile on Fox News yesterday, house clown Harris Faulkner announced that “schools weren’t closed” during the 1918 pandemic, and that people suffered because penicillin hadn’t been invented. Schools were indeed closed all over the country. And even if they penicillin, it wouldn’t have helped. That’s not what cures covid– which that was — or the flu. But Fox just spouts inanity all day long. Maybe that’s why viewers are leaving!

“General Hospital” Actor Loses Case Against ABC Over Anti-Vax Firing, Supported by Conspiracy Theorist Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

We will not be seeing Ingo Rademacher any more daytime dramas.

Rademacher lost his own daytime drama yesterday when a judge ruled against in favor of ABC. The “General Hospital” actor refused to be vaccinated after Disney-ABC ordered all staff to get the shots during the pandemic. Judge Stephen Goorvitch. ruled that Rademacher had no “religious exemption.”

The actor was supported in his cause by conspiracy theorist Robert F. Kennedy Jr., who thinks he can get the Democratic nomination for president based on a platform of lies and twisted science. The Rademacher ruling should be a setback for him.

More alarming: Rademacher based his “religious exemption” claim on a book he said he followed called “The Revelation of Ramala.” Obscure and out of print, “Revelations” is described as a “blending of Eastern enlightenment philosophy with Christian principles, to develop an ideal of “Christ-light”. To develop one’s Christ-light is to be able to perform miracles such as Jesus was capable.”

More importantly: Rademacher played Jasper Jacks on and off for 25 years on “General Hospital.” Australian, with a noticeable accent, Jacks could be easily recast. Rademacher will not be returning to the role.