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Ashton Kutcher: Jewish for the Jokes?

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In my favorite “Seinfeld” episode, titled “The Yadda Yadda” ‘ an episode by the way that includes the famous “Yada Yada” ‘ Jerry accuses dentist Dr. Whatley of converting to Judaism so he can tell his patients Jewish jokes. That’s why the same episode is alternately known as “The Anti-Dentite.”

And so, too, Ashton Kutcher ‘‘who is not Jewish and has not converted ‘ may be turning his version of Jewish, for the jokes. Tonight, in exchange for showing up at GQ Magazine’s Gentleman’s Ball, Kutcher is making sure his “rabbi” is getting honored, too. Yehuda Berg, son of the man who invented Los Angeles’s money making Kabbalah Center, is also receiving an award. Oy!

Berg is one of two sons of Philip Berg, nee Feivel Gruberger, and his second wife, Karen. (The other son, Michael, is behind Madonna’s Raising Malawi organization.) According to published reports, Philip Berg ‘ that is, former insurance salesman Feivel Gruberger ‘ was married to the niece of the famous Kabbalist Rabbi Brandwein. Berg left her and their eight children, married Karen and started the Kabbalah Center. He claimed to be the heir to the Kabbalah tradition, although Brandwein’s relatives denounced him. Now, Yehuda Berg has said in interviews that Kabbalah isn’t for Jews, but for everyone.

And those “everyones” have to pay and pay’ and pay for a sense of wisdom and “inner peace.” They wear the expensive red string bracelets, and buy copies of the “Zohar” ‘ the Kabbalah books of gibberish combining astrology and fortune cookie sayings ‘ for hundreds of dollars more.

According to its 2008 tax filing, the’Kabbalah Center has net assets of $25 million. That doesn’t include all their offshoots, curriculums’ (Spirituality for Kids: $11 million in assets), real estate holdings and three corporations. It’s big, big business.

Kutcher, who was raised in Iowa, was swallowed by the Kabbalah Center when he hooked up with actress Demi Moore. She and Madonna are the two big Kabbalah celebrities.

The Kabbalah Center has a crazy history of infighting, by the way. In 2005, the head of the Tel Aviv office was investigated by authorities for allegedly extorting $36,000 from a terminal cancer patient after promising to cure her. The woman’s husband subsequently dropped the charges for unknown reasons. Kabbalah rewarded the chief, Shaul Youdkevitch, by bringing him to Los Angeles to amp that office. But Youdkevitch, who was apparently one of Madonna’s mentors, had a fight with Karen Berg, left and started his own Kabbalah center. The Bergs then sued him for stealing “trade secrets.” (Like: the red string must be finished in a sailor’s knot. Just kidding!)

Interestingly, Kutcher ‘ who is of Irish descent ‘ may be turning Jewish (kinda) for the jokes. His business partner and best friend is Jason Goldberg, an independent film producer behind all those Kutcher projects like “Punk’D” and “Beauty and the Geek.” Goldberg grew up in ritzy Bel-Air and married his wife, child star Soleil Moon Frye (”Punky Brewster”) , in a traditional ‘ not Kabbalah ‘ Jewish ceremony.

As a side text, instead of the Zohar, I’d rent Paul Mazursky’s’”Down and Out in Beverly Hills” for further edification.

Anyway, as Tim Whatley might say now, “Have you heard the one about the Kabbalist, the Scientologist, and the actor?”

Ben Stiller Goes Bowling for Dollars

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Ben Stiller is going to bowling for dollars Thursday night.

Stiller and wife Christine Taylor are co-hosting the annual Project ALS event at Lucky Strike lanes on the west side of Manhattan.

Here are just some of the people will be cooling their palms over the little fans: Ben’s parents, Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, my favorite “Mad” man, John Slattery, as well as’ Richard Kind, Janeane Garofalo, Rob Morrow, Caroline Rhea, Jesse Martin, Tom Cavanagh, Vincent Spano, Bill Hader, John Franco, Gina Gershon, Sarah Silverman, and John Stamos.

Even more celebs are expected. Pat Harrington, who runs Project ALS, says the group has met its goal for the season, but still has tickets for anyone interested.

Let me tell you: Jenifer Estess was an amazing person whom I knew quite well many years ago. She was full of love and life. She invented the Naked Angels theater group with pals Fisher Stevens, Rob Morrow, and Marisa Tomei. She brought in her best college bud, John Kennedy Jr., And then she was diagnosed with ALS, aka Lou Gehrig’s Disease. She and her sisters started Project ALS, and she fought back.

Jenifer is gone now, but Project ALS lives on and thrives. It sounds like a pretty fun night, too. For tickets and info, call Pat at 212-480-6940 or email her at hhsprnyc@aol.com.

Why “Mad Men” Is Really “Dallas” in Disguise

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Sunday night’s “Mad Men” hit out of the ballpark again. Don Draper was finally confronted by his wife Betty over his secret past. As fans know, the character’s real name is Dick Whitman. He traded identities with the real, now dead, Don, in Korea.

But wait. Also in last night’s episode, we learned (if not before) that Don’s wife, Betty, is actually known as Betsy by her family.

What’s in a name? An old flame of Roger Sterling shows up and resists changing the name of her dog food company after a scandal. They’ve been revealed for using horsemeat. It’s the name her father gave the company, says the woman (played with perfection by guest Mary Page Keller). Don tells her, it’s just a name, you can’t do anything but change it. Even Roger (the great John Slattery) remarks, Just slap a new label on the can.

Well, isn’t that what Don did when he abandoned Dick Whitman?

There are two episodes left for “Mad Men” this season, an insufficient number. In the old days you’d get a 22 or 26 episode order. Thirteen installments for so many characters is frustrating. Joan, our red-headed bombshell, has been sorely shortchanged. The story of Peggy and Pete’s baby has not been addressed once. They’ve also gotten short shrift. The digression to Sal’s firing and his gay secret life also was backburnered fast. That storyline felt like the “Sopranos” similar diversion with Vinnie in Vermont.

Sunday’s episode took place on Halloween 1963, meaning we are heading now into two final episodes. This Sunday may include the Kennedy assassination and the wedding plans of Sterling’s daughter. Perhaps the final installment will take place on New Year’s Eve. (So far, it’s been one episode per month of 1963.)

But the real story of “Mad Men” season three was about the rise to power of Betty, Lady MacBeth in a pillbox hat. She’s tasted politics, and a politician. She’s gained the upper hand with Don after leveling her own brother. She has disdain for her children. What she does next is going to be interesting. Like it or not, Betty overcame Peggy and Joan as the top female in this season.

And isn’t Betty really Sue Ellen Ewing without a drinking problem? “Mad Men” is really just a “Dallas” for the millenium. Don is definitely J.R. Bert Cooper is Jock Ewing. Roger Sterling is Cliff Barnes. Joan is Lucy Ewing. Peggy is a reinvented Bobby Ewing. If she had a story, Jane, Roger’s new wife, would be Pam Ewing. And all those guys in the Sterling Cooper office? They’re the Greek chorus, the oil cartel and Harve Smithfield. Forget remaking “Dallas.” It’s already been done.

Madonna’s African School Unlike Oprah’s in Many Ways

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So Madonna went back to Malawi yesterday and planted a tree where her girls academy will be built. She says it will be a $15 million school.

Her press materials say that Madonna’s school, called the Raising Malawi Academy, will be like Oprah’s Leadership Academy in South Africa.

Well, it won’t be like Oprah’s school at all. Winfrey’s school is modeled on several well-known private schools in the U.S. including Miss Porter’s in Connecticut. The curriculum is a broad spectrum of liberal arts.

On the other hand: Madonna’s school will teach Spirituality for Kids, the curriculum of the Kabbalah Center of Los Angeles. It’s a gibberish program attached to Philip Berg’s form of “kabbalah,” mystical teachings that in their real form are part of advanced Judiac studies.

The Kabbalah Center is anchored around several books and other teachings all of which cost plenty in the long run. It is anathema to traditional Judaism. Real kabbalah is studied by 40-year-old men as a treat after years of intensive training.

Kabbalah Center kabbalah is like skipping to dessert instead of having a big meal. It’s its own reward.

Raising Malawi was started by the Bergs and Madonna in 2006, when they began flying adult Malawians to Los Angeles for Kabbalah indoctrination. The group didn’t get its 501 c 3 non profit status, however, until late 2008.

In early 2008, the group raised money through the Gucci Foundation because it still didn’t have its own certification. The group is now selling $1,200 18K gold ingot pendants on its website to raise money. Madonna herself donated $284,000 to Raising Malawi in 2008 through her Ray of Light Foundation, and another $150,000 to Spirituality for Kids.

Paul McCartney Finally Gets to Play Broadway

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Believe it or not, Sir Paul McCartney (age 67 but looking ten years younger at least) finally got to perform on Broadway last night after 50 years in showbiz.

The occasion was one of those rare, memorable nights in the theater: an Actors Fund tribute to the late, famed songwriter-composer Frank Loesser, the man behind “Guys and Dolls,” “How to Succeed in Business Without Really Tying” and countless other songs and shows including the Oscar winner “Baby It’s Cold Outside.”’ Loesser’s life was cut short by lung cancer in 1969 when he was just 59 years old.

McCartney has owned the Loesser catalog for some time as part of his MPL Communications. He and Loesser’s widow, the fabled Jo Sullivan, cooked up the idea of the tribute together. Then they set about organizing an amazing array of Broadway talent to pull it off. Annette Bening” sporting short short hair, and pitching in like a sport ‘ co-hosted the night’ with Jonathan Tisch and Kevin McCollum. Chita Rivera kicked off the night by telling a story of how she got caught wearing no panties on stage one night early in her career.

Among the stars who came to the Minskoff Theater and performed: the simply astounding Audra McDonald (totally wasted in her TV series, if you ask me). She showed her star power singing “Can’t Stop Talking” from the 1950 film “Let’s Dance” and later with’ Marc Kudisch (fresh from “Nine to Five”) in “My Heart Is So Full of You.”

There were plenty of other show stopping performances, including Michele Lee singing “I Believe in You,” from “How to Succeed.” Michele was in the original production of that show; back-to-back appearances by Broadway married couple Stephen Pasquale and Laura Benanti; plus special guest Art Garfunkel (”Two Sleepy People”), Mario Cantone (”Sit Down, You’re Rocking the Boat”), Brian Stokes Mitchell (”Luck Be a Lady”), Ana Gasteyer (”Adelaide’s Lament”), Patrick Wilson (”Joey, Joey, Joey”), and John Stamos with Gary Vichi and and Ramona Keller (”Brotherhood of Man”).

There were plenty of Broadway stars too: Liz Larsen, Noah Racey, Liz Callaway, Judy Kuhn, Debbie Gravitte.

Sir Paul finally got in the act as the penultimate performer, singing “On a Slow Boat to China.” He held his own with all these Broadway belters, and even declared, “I finally made it to Broadway!”

He sure did, and later he was busy accepting kudos and thanks at Blue Fin in the W Hotel with girlfriend Nancy Shevell Blakeman. (She’s very nice, by the way, with a good sense of humor.) McCartney met everyone who approached him, but the best moment was the appearance of Oscar winner Richard Dreyfus. “I want to meet the Beatle,” he punned. McCartney piped up: “It’s great to meet you.” And Dreyfus, a long time fan, was speechless for the first time in his life. “Oh my god, yes,” he replied, staring at McCartney.

McCartney returns to Britain today, missing this week’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame shows. “I have to be in England,” he said, although someone close to him remarked, “What’s the point of those shows?” Good question. McCartney and I also spoke briefly about all the Beatle reissues, the box sets, etc. Was he discovering things he hadn’t heard before, I asked?

“Not really, I lived it. But I’m remembering a lot as I go through it,” he said.’ McCartney’s own new CD/DVD set, “Live from Citi Field,” will be released next month.

By the way, as usual, the whole after party was vegan, as declared by McCartney. All his events are catered this way. If you get to go to four a year, you’ve had a good cleansing. Paul says he’s still working on bringing Linda McCartney’s Homemade vegan food line to the U.S.

And how was McCartney as part of a big ensemble cast? A diva? No, quite the contrary. “His dressing room was next to ours,” said “My Big Greek Wedding” star Nia Vardalos who surprised the crowd with her musical comedy chops. “We had four girls in there ‘ me, Ana Gasteyer, Liz Callaway, and Paul just came in and hung out with us until the show started. He was great.”

...MAGICAL NIGHT: There was a lot of theater in New York last night. Vanessa Redgrave performed Joan Didion’s one woman show, “The Year of Magical Thinking,” at St. John the Divine. The night had been postponed from last spring because of the tragic death of Redgrave’s daughter, Natasha Richardson. In “Magical Thinking,” Didion recalls surviving the death of her husband and the serious illness of her daughter. The daughter subsequently died. In the audience: Redgrave’s actress sister, Lynn; Meryl Streep with daughter Mamie Gummer; “Billy Elliot” and “The Reader” director Stephen Daldry; Wallace Shawn, and Christine Baranski...

Sting Brings “Winter” to Famed New York Cathedral

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58574519You heard it here first: Sting is bringing his “If On a Winter’s Night” show to St. John the Divine in Harlem.

An announcement is forthcoming about concerts planned for December 8 and 9. They will be similar to the ones he performed in England at Durham Cathedral. Tickets go on sale on November 2.

No, there will be no “Roxanne.” But on “If On a Winter’s Night,” Sting has revisited his classic, “The Hounds of Winter.” It’s beautifully wrought, as are all 15 of these imaginative, thought provoking and extremely pleasurable tracks. They find Sting in great voice, by the way. And while the songs are not Christmas carols, they are eminently hummable.

Further down in this site you will see our exclusive stream of a track from the album, called “The Burning Babe.” Jackie DeJohnette plays the drums on it. How cool is that?

By the way, the main musicians on the album include Dominic Miller, Mary MacMaster, Julian Sutton, Kathyrn Tickell, and Bijan Chemirani. Robert Sadin produced along with Sting.

Jacko Music Will Stay at Sony, No Universal Talk

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Michael Jackson’s recorded music will likely stay with Sony Music.

Contrary to reports today, no one connected with Michael Jackson has any idea of talks to move Jackson’s records to Universal Music Group.

A source close to the action says of Michael’s post-2004 unreleased catalog, “There is much music.”

But how much completed music is another issue. Jackson was arrested in 2003, and endured two years of trial-related misery. It’s unknown if he was writing very much at the time.

Following his acquittal, Jackson spent a year or more abroad, in Bahrain, Ireland, and briefly in France. In Bahrain he was supposed to be recording an album for Prince Abdulla under an agreement that was never fulfilled. Following that he wrote a few songs with will.i.am of the Black Eyed Peas, and another with Pras of the Fugees. A few of those recordings exist for inclusion on a CD. Also, the charity single “What More Can I Give?” featuring Celine Dion and a bunch of stars has never officially been released. Sony’s Tommy Mottola refused to put it out in 2001 after Jackson recorded it.

Moving from Sony would be a problem anyway. Jackson’s estate is still a 50% owner of Sony/ATV Music Publishing. The estate has representatives on the board of directors of that company. For better or worse, Michael Jackson and Sony are a marriage with divorce a minor possibility.

‘This Is It’ on THR.com

Join us Tuesday at 4 p.m. PT for a live stream from the red carpet (courtesy of UStream below) at the “This Is It” premiere. Stick around as THR’s Steven Zeitchik and Matthew Belloni give you the inside scoop on the world-premiere screening from Los Angeles. And look for a instant review to arrive right after the movie!

Live TV : Ustream

Michael Jackson Is Finally A Movie Star

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How ironic. Michael Jackson is dead. But in “This Is It,” the filmed chronicle of rehearsals for shows that never happened, he finally gets his greatest wish granted: He’s a movie star (here’s THR’s review from Kirk Honeycutt).

“This Is It” is quite extraordinary. If there was any doubt that Michael was in control of the shows or his decisions, those fears are allayed here. Maybe he was sleeping 15 hours a day. But during these rehearsals, he couldn’t have been more focused or hardworking. It is truly amazing considering the last 16 years of total lunacy to see him so capable.

Director Kenny Ortega was smart in his edits. You see Michael almost from the beginning, dancing up a storm, singing without assistance vibrantly. True, he is very thin. But you also see that it’s a result of working out like crazy. Yes, he could have been five pounds heavier. But I dare anyone who sees this movie to try one of Michael’s moves.

“This Is It” is also notable for its emotional moments. At the end of a rehearsal of the Jackson 5 hit “I’ll Be There,” he calls out all of his brothers for a thank-you, as well as both parents. It’s a three-hanky moment. Some of his family will be embarrassed now about the way they’ve behaved.

One thing’s for sure: AEG spent a lot of money on this show. The production numbers are spectacular and sumptuous. “Smooth Criminal” is one of the standouts. The making of the “Thriller” number in 3D is remarkable.

And just wait ’til you see and hear him sing “I Just Can’t Stop Loving You” and “The Way You Make Me Feel” as Michael sings the blues and teaches the musicians how to play his charts. “It needs more booty,” he tells a keyboard player trying to get the right sexiness.

Will “This Is It,” dedicated to Michael’s kids, be a hit? Let’s put it this way: I already want to see it again. The fans will see it five times. Expect Sony to extend this release. “This Is It” is the “Thriller” of the year.

As Michael himself says, it’s a great adventure.

For another take on the “This Is It” premiere on the West Coast, check out THR’s’Risky Business blog. Read the film review by THR chief film critic Kirk Honeycutt here.

THE STARS COME OUT IN NYC

Spike Lee was the first boldfaced name we saw wander into Theater 9 at the Regal E Walk tonight for “This Is It.” He had his kids with him. The rest of the A-list gang followed: Gayle King, Russell Simmons, Sherri Shepherd. Famed director Lasse Hallstrom brought his 14-year-old daughter. “Law & Order: SVU” star Tamara Tunie arrived with buddy Marva Hicks. Bob and Lynne Balaban took corner seats. Clive Davis snuck in with two lady friends at the last minute. Elsewhere in the room, DJ Cassidy – a wild Michael Jackson fan– was already thinking about queueing up for the midnight show. There were rare appearances by Ed and Annie Pressman, Johnny Pigozzi and Ken Sunshine. And these were just the people Peggy Siegal stocked Theatre 9 with — Bryan Bantry had his own gang in No. 8.

It was a far cry from the shallow nuttiness we watched on the screen from Hollywood. Leanza Cornett, once a Miss America, is no Katie Couric, that’s for sure. She looked at a loss as a gaggle of ferociously unimportant people filed by her: Jennifer Love Hewitt and her boyfriend, Jamie Kennedy; American Idols Adam Lambert and David Cook; a bewildered Paula Abdul. Nia Long. Will Smith was smart and didn’t go near her. Also seen on the red carpet: fake Jackson kid Omer Bhatti and his mom, Pia Bhatti, still looking for some spotlight. And then the Jackson brothers Marlon, Tito, and Jackie –– nice guys. They almost got to speak, but then Jermaine –resplendent in a blue magic carpet of a coat that looked like it was made by Persian Bob’s Cut Rate Carpets — horned in and started answering questions. The other brothers barely looked at him. In the background was a guy known only as Raffles, a Joe Jackson lackey with a sketchy history who skipped his usual yellow jacket full of black question marks. The whole thing was summed up in its total lack of importance by Cornett interviewing Mary Hart. All they were missing was Bubbles the Chimp…

Be My Bebe; Roseanne’s Sister Moves to Brighton Beach

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Friday night’s Bebe Buell show at photographer Bob Gruen’s birthday party was one of those things you didn’t want to miss. The party was in a first floor space narrow as the Concorde on West 24th St. The clog of people at the bar couldn’t have been melted by Drano! But that’s where the booze and the Veneiro’s chocolate birthday cake were, so while a Blondie cover band wailed away “One Way or Another” folks from the outside tried to snake their way from the entrance to the stage. They included two formidable women: Ronnie Spector, and Suzanne Vega. (They were in separate groups.) Ronnie told me she has a new album coming next month, one that she’s been working on for so long that Joey Ramone produced three of the tracks. Suzanne Vega is busy re-recording a lot of her catalog acoustically, for release in February. Meanwhile, the cake was passed, “Happy Birthday” was heard being sung in various corners, and Buell went over so well she had to play four extra songs…

…Saturday night: Neil Simon’s “Brighton Beach Memoirs” stars Laurie Metcalf, known to the world as Rosenanne Barr’s TV sister, Jackie. She’s also, ahem, one of the foremost alums of Chicago’s Steppenwolf Theater. She steps into the role originated by Linda Lavin twenty years ago. Jessica Hecht plays her sister. You know her from “Friends” maybe. The show also features Dennis Boutsikaris, Santino Fontana, Alexandra Socha and Noah Robbins in the Matthew Broderick role of Eugene Jerome.’ The themes of “Brighton Beach” are timeless, and maybe all the more pungent now since the family is bursting its house at the seams and trying to make ends meet. All the actors are terrific, and many of them (hopefully) will overlap when “Broadway Bound” starts playing in tandem with “BBM” in November. Metcalf is a gem. No one gives a comic dead stare like she does. Don’t miss her…

Will the World End on November 13, 2009?

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The world may come to an end on November 13th for Columbia Pictures/Sony. Or make that November 14, aka “the day after tomorrow.”

Even as Sony braces itself for the Michael Jackson release, “This Is It,” another movie looms larger right after it. Roland Emerich’s “2012,” which cost a minimum of $200 million and was supposed to have been released last summer, is finally on its way.

“2012″ looks a lot like another Emmerich movie, “The Day After Tomorrow,” which featured Jake Gyllenhaal trudging through blizzards, tornadoes, and tidal waves. From the trailers, it sure seems like John Cusack is about to escape the collapse of ‘ gasp! ‘ the whole physical world as he drives through computer generated earthquakes, crumbling buildings, and general subsidence.

The theme song should be, “It’s the End of the World As We Know It ‘ And I Feel Fine.”

No doubt trailers for “2012″ will be tacked onto the beginning of “This Is It.” It will be interesting to see the reaction. Are audiences yearning for a 70s style disaster movie? Or is “2012″ a disaster of a movie? Even more important, do normal people really believe the world will come to an end on December 21, 2012? Or this just a Y2K kind of marketing ploy that will blow up (yes. I said it) in everyone’s faces?

Sony’s had a pretty good run this fall with “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs,” “Zombieland,” and the remake of “The Stepfather.” But those three were all relatively low budget ‘ as everything is ‘ compared to “2012.” Big Sony doesn’t look for Oscars; they’ve got Sony Pictures Classics for that, where “An Education,” “The Last Station,” “Lebanon,” and “Broken Embraces” could all be in the awards mix. Big Sony is where the money is, and so far, so good.

Maybe “2012″ will be the blockbuster that Emmerich’s “Independence Day” (one of my favorite guilty pleasure movies of all time) was. Maybe not. But having seen “The Road,” with Viggo Mortensen, I can tell you that John Hillcoat’s film is the more serious meditation on the end of the world. It resonates for days after viewing.’ “2012″ will be the dessert.