JESSICA SIMPSON GETS A SECOND CHANCE

Jessica Simpson is on the cover of Vanity Fair. You would think for June that Vanity Fair would bestow such an honor on an actress from a big summer movie, someone who’d earned such an honor.

But let’s face it: VF, like all magazines, is a dogfight for circulation. Oscar winners aren’t going to cut it. Simpson is a stroke of genius: she’s just tabloid enough to bring in new readers, and attractive enough to make the cut.

She’s also borderline enough that the magazine sidesteps its usual puff piece attitude and is a tad rougher on this celeb than they’ve been to others in the recent past. But Simpson and her manager dad Joe can take it. There’s nothing here we haven’t heard before about either of them.

The fact is, the Mario Testino pictures are sensational. And no matter how you slice it, this girl is not going anywhere. She’s young, hot, and she can sing. She’s also got a famous football player boyfriend. Jessica Simpson is going to be around long after we’re gone!

So kudos to her pr team. Getting the cover of VF is a coup. And VF shows its savvy: by turning her into an icon apart from the other US Weekly cuties, the magazine has probably scored a circulation triumph for itself. Everybody wins.

PS All this talk of who’s fat and who isn’t: glass houses, folks. That’s all I’m sayin’…

JANE FONDA GETS HER TONY NOMINATION

It only took 40 years, but Jane Fonda has a Tony nomination this morning. She was nominated for Best Actress in a Play for “33 Variations.” This is the best news I’ve heard in a long time. Fonda not only deserves it, but she could win. And she’s in a formidable category, with two theater heavyweights–Janet McTeer and Harriett Walter from “Mary Stuart”– and two Hollywood favorites — Marcia Gay Harden and Hope Davis from “God of Carnage.”

Fonda emailed me today she’s particularly proud of the other four nominations for “33 Variations” including the set designer Derek McLane. His set for the Beethoven archives is dazzling.

The Tony nominations are otherwise mostly expected. There are other a couple of surprises and snubs, though. The Tony nominators completely ignored “Irena’s Vow” and actress Tovah Feldshuh–this was a mistake, I feel. The play is wonderful, and the audiences love it.

On the other hand, the Tony’s were kinder to “Pal Joey” and “Guys and Dolls” than those shows deserved. The group also didn’t do a lot for “West Side Story,” snubbing the men from the show while rewarding only the ladies.

But 2009 has been great on Broadway, better than in years and years. CBS may finally have a hit Tony show in the ratings come June 7th, what with all the familiar Hollywood faces who’ve held forth this spring. In the end though expect lots of wins for “Billy Elliott,” nominated deservedly for 15 awards. It’s going to clean up!

‘STAR TREK’ REVIVED: SIZZLING, SEXY, AND COOL

The new “Star Trek,” movie directed by J.J. Abrams of ‘Lost’ and ‘Mission: Impossible 3’ fame, is buoyant, sexy and cool. It’s hard to imagine, but Abrams has completely revived a moribund movie idea, reinvented it and pointed in a direction no man has gone before.

Well, maybe once before: this is akin to what happened with ‘Spider Man 2.’ The new ‘Star Trek’ is a revelation.

I saw ‘Star Trek’ with an audience last night in a big theater. When you see it this way, this weekend, you’ll be thrilled: there is lots of spontaneous applause, laughter, and communal ‘uh-huhs’ as Abrams and crew reference the original TV series and the best of the early ‘Star Trek’ films.

It helps that they’ve cast it perfectly, because this is the story of all the ‘Star Trek’ characters before we met them on the Enterprise in 1967. What a genius idea, and how clever as the characters assemble one by one: Spock (Jeremy Quinto), Captain Kirk (Chris Pine), Bones (Karl Urban), Uhura (Zoe Saldana), Scotty (Simon Pegg), Chekhov (Anton Yelchin) and Sulu (John Cho).

There are even some unusual choices for peripheral characters. Winona Ryder makes a welcome appearance as Spock’s mother. Ben Cross, from ‘Chariots of Fire,’ plays his dad. (Jane Wyatt and Mark Lenard played them originally on TV.) Tyler Perry makes his acting debut outside of his own films as an admiral.

Abrams et al have also revived a character from the TV show pilot, Captain Pike, who preceeded Kirk. This time he’s played dead on by the estimable Bruce Greenwood. Eric Bana‘nearly unrecognizable in makeup’is Romulan bad boy Nero. Clifton Collins Jr. (from ‘Capote’) is terrific as Nero’s sick sidekick, Ayel.

And there are numerous ‘Easter eggs’ buried throughout the film for fans and fanatics. One that I caught: At the Vulcan council there’s an admiral named James Komack. (He has the only name plate, and it’s big.) The real Komack was the beloved producer/director/actor who directed the ‘Star Trek’ pilot for TV. He was also Bill Bixby’s best friend on ‘Courtship of Eddie’s Father’ way back when. He died in 1977.

I also thought I saw, toward the end of the movie, someone who looked like a young Walter Koenig, the original Chekhov, matted into the background. Maybe, maybe not.

And, of course, Leonard Nimoy makes a long cameo as Spock himself. It’s a device that works, since he’s visiting from the future. William Shatner has complained about not being asked back as Kirk. But in this episode, it would have been too much. Maybe next time, since Abrams has made time travel’do you watch ‘Lost’?’his recurring them.

But the most important thing about Abrams’ ‘Star Trek’ is that it’s the rare combination of total crowd pleaser and a work of movie art its makers can be proud of. They’ve breathed life into a well known concept with respect and originality. They’ve also avoided making it campy, or sending it up in any way. These new players take talk of Romulans, Klingons, Vulcans, warp speed and the rest of it quite seriously.

So just wait: if you thought ‘Wolverine’ had a good weekend, get ready for this ‘Star Trek’ to steal all the thunder starting Thursday in its IMAX edition. The movie will break records, set new ones, and inspire more lunatic Trekkie frenzy than ever before. What a tribute to Gene Roddenberry that 43 years after his TV series was cancelled three seasons in, ‘Star Trek’ in all its glory is still here and better than ever. I won’t be the first to paraphrase the Vulcan salute this week, but ‘Star Trek’ should live long and prosper!

ELIZABETH EDWARDS ON OPRAH: WHO’S TELLING THE TRUTH?

Either John Edwards hasn’t told his wife, Elizabeth, the truth about anything, or Elizabeth has reworked the truth for her own peace of mind.

Either way, whatever she’s telling Oprah this week on her syndicated show doesn’t jibe with the reality of how hubby John met ex-girlfriend Rielle Hunter.

Elizabeth, promoting her new book, ‘Resilience,’ tells Oprah that Hunter’whose name is not uttered on Oprah’s show lest she become ‘real’ to the audience– was more or less a stalker who preyed on the ex-Senator and possible presidential candidate until she got what she wanted.

Elizabeth Edwards tells Oprah, according to one report, that she thought Hunter waited for her husband when she spotted him in a New York hotel restaurant. She says Hunter told her husband, ‘You are so hot.’

The delusional part of this is that the wife believes the husband was a passive participant, an unwitting victim, in all of this. She’s somehow forgotten her husband is a former US senator and trial lawyer who’s so rich that they’re now living in a 28,000 square foot house.

In fact, as I’ve heard it over the last year from sources, Hunter and some friends literally bumped into Edwards outside the Regency Hotel on Park Avenue and got into a conversation. ‘There was no loitering,’ says a source. The meeting was a coincidence.

And then Elizabeth also tells Oprah that she ‘has no idea’ whether or not Hunter’s 15 month old baby girl Frances was fathered by John Edwards. She’s an attorney and former law clerk to a federal judge, the author of two books, makes thousands of dollars on the lecture circuit, is supposed to have been a reckoning force in Edwards’ political campaigns. Yet, Elizabeth Edwards wants us to believe that she doesn’t know the truth about her husband’s illegitimate child, the half sibling of her own children.

Maybe the title of the book should have been, ‘Denial.’

KARL AND ANNA AT ‘LAGER’-HEADS?; TIME’S 20

Are famed designer Karl Lagerfeld and Vogue editor Anna Wintour at ‘Lager-heads,’ so to speak? I’m told Lagerfeld backed out of Wintour’s annual Met Museum Costume Ball at the last minute. Maybe he got test pictures of what Madonna was planning to wear. Wintour was said to be furious since so many other regulars skipped the event this year. For the record, the Costume Ball and dinner are a big loser in and of itself for the Museum, costing over a million bucks. The upside, of course, is contributions to the museum and support for its programs. But still, does it have to run so deep in the red during a recession year?…
‘Time Magazine’s 100 dinner produced a lot of stars who didn’t make the list. They looked good, anyway, from Liv Tyler and Kate Hudson to Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy. For some reason, movie comedy factory producer Judd Apatow (‘Superbad,’ ‘Knocked Up,’ etc) was there with his comedienne wife Leslie Mann even though neither of them was on the list. It’s possible he thought the Jon Favreau who was honored was the director of ‘Iron Man.’ He’s not. He’s President Obama‘s wunderkind speechwriter. PS The big stars were Oprah, and of course, Michelle Obama’

JACKO SHOWS MAY NOT START ON TIME

No, it’s not bad as you think. But yes, there may be a little rejiggering in Jackoville.

The word from the West Coast is that Michael Jackson’s London shows, set to start on July 8th, may not begin exactly on that day.

No, it’s not that Michael has a spider bite or is exhausted or wearing pajamas. Not yet.

The situation is more concrete than that: July 8th is just two months away, and some of the sets needed for the shows at the O2 Arena may not be ready in time.

Two months isn’t much time, when you think about it. Consider that Jackson has not performed a full length show since September 10, 2001. That’s almost eight years ago. Right now, Michael Bearden‘Jackson’s musical director’and Kenny Ortega‘are playing ‘beat the clock’ to get the show ready for any launch in July. Putting off the official start is the least of their problems.

What I’m told, and what is being banded about, is that July 13th or 14th will be the actual start date. Shows set for earlier than that would have to be rescheduled.

It’s not so hard to do: AEGLive has booked the O2 Arena for Jackson on even numbered dates through July. An extra blank day is scheduled between every show for ‘insurance’ purposes’just in case Jackson needs to put off a performance for a day.

Of course, ticketing is already something of a sore subject regarding these Michael Jackson shows. If you try to buy tickets through Jackson’s website, fans are no longer sent to purchase face value tickets through Ticketmaster.com. Instead, Jackson’s website links directly to a ‘Secondary’ ticket selling service called viagogo.com, owned by the guy who started and sold the legal scalping service, Stub Hub.

This means that Jackson tickets are only refundable at face value. But they’re sold at a huge mark up. Some people have already started questioning who gets the difference in price.

A March 12th story in the Times of London already concluded that some kind of ‘secret deal’ had occurred concerning Jackson tickets. You can read it at http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/music/article5891378.ece.

Things haven’t really improved since the article ran. Viagogo is selling Jackson tickets for ten times their face value for all the dates scheduled so far.

One person who shouldn’t have too much trouble getting good seats: Michelle Obama. According to Michael Bearden’s official bio, he and the First Lady have been friends for thirty years or more. Expect to see her on opening night, whenever that is.

PETE SEEGER TURNS 90, FOLKIES REUNITE

Madison Square Garden was filled last night with earthy, crunchy types who didn’t mind singing along to summer camp favorites like ‘Michael, Row Your Boat,’ and ‘There’s’ A Hole in the Bucket.’

The real shock was that just about every seat was taken for Pete Seeger‘s 90th birthday fest. Are there really that many folkies left in a time of IPods, hip hop, ringtones, and raves?

Or was everyone really there to hear the advertised big stars: Bruce Springsteen, John Mellencamp, and Dave Matthews? If they were, they might have been disappointed. The bulk of the four hour extravaganza was centered on folkie folks who haven’t gotten together in a long time and were rarely heard much on the radio ‘back in the day’: Joan Baez, Arlo Guthrie, Kris Kristofferson, Richie Havens, Taj Mahal, and so on.

For the kids in the audience’and there were plenty of young people’who knows what they thought when they heard 68 year old Baez’s gorgeous still intact clarion call of a voice swoop through ‘Where Have All the Flowers Gone?’ It was maybe the standout of the entire evening. Baez remains incomparable. Where, I wondered, is her Kennedy Center honor? She sure deserves it.

Springsteen, by the way, did perform at the end of the show’a beautiful version of ‘The Ghost of Tom Joad.’ Backstage he entertained his managers Barbara Carr and Jon Landau, old pal Dave Marsh. And Tim Robbins, Susan Sarandon and their kids. One of the more poignant moments last night was a performance of ‘Michael Row Your Boar Ashore’ by Robbins with 17 year old son Miles on guitar and sweet vocals. In case you didn’t know, Tim’s dad, Gil Robbins, had a chart hit with that song in 1961 with his legendary folk group, The Highwaymen.’ (http://www.answers.com/topic/the-highwaymen). Gil Robbins also ran the famed Gaslight nightclub in Greenwich Village, where Bob Dylan‘among others’played their first New York shows.

Also said to be in the house last night: another legend, Harry Belafonte, the great concert promoter, Ron Delsener, and several members of the Kennedy family.

Seeger, who’s a tough bird at 90, came and went through the night, performing some songs, joining in on others. The night was mostly about music, although there were some biographical videos and mention of his astonishing political history. Here’s a performer whose reward for refusing to name names during the McCarthy era was a prison sentence subsequently overturned, who stood on principle time and time again through the Vietnam era, on issues of the environment and civil rights, no matter what it did to his career. In other words, he had integrity’something in short supply today.

CAT ON A HOT TIN GOOF; TIME MARCHES ON

As you might have guessed, that ‘secret’ Cat Stevens show scheduled for New York’s Highline Ballroom for last night didn’t happen. What did happen: Stevens, aka Yusuf Islam, was cleared for entering the U.S. but didn’t get his work visa in time. A new show is being set up for New York, but the scheduled Los Angeles event’set for May 11th’is going forward.
‘Some of us will try to brave the weather and see the Yankees beat the Sox tonight at the new, expensive stadium. Others will head to Time Magazine’s annual dinner for the mag’s 100 most interesting people. There are some great choices on the list (Lang Lang, Penelope Cruz, Secretary of Energy Steven Chu) and idiotic ones (the women from ‘The View’-huh?). Anyway, maybe hip hop star M.I.A. will meet Ted Kennedy. You never know’

WOLVERINE REAL NUMBERS $2MIL LESS THAN THOUGHT

The real numbers for “Wolverine” are in from the weekend, and 20th Century Fox was a little overanxious. They originally reported the Hugh Jackman starrer at $87 million. The real take was $85 million plus change.

It’s not a huge difference, but it’s significant. “Wolverine” opened on Friday to a staggering $34 million box office. But over the weekend, the numbers went down dramatically– to $29 million on Saturday night and $21 million on Sunday.

All of this begs the question: by this Friday, will “Wolverine” be done? J.J. Abrams’ “Star Trek” is coming, a mega hit that should knock “Wolverine” handily out of the top spot. From advance word, “Star Trek” also seems like it’s going to have great reviews and etrrific word of mouth. “Wolverine” had some of the worst reviews ever for a blockbuster.

So we’ll watch and see this week if “Wolverine” has any steam left among adults–the moviegoers on week nights. By Wednesday it should be obvious if Gavin Hood’s tale has legs, or just claws.

“WOLVERINE” SURPRISE UNVEILED BY MOVIE BLOG

oOr is it blob? Harry Knowles, the editor of movie blog Aint-It-Cool-News, has deliberately revealed a big surprise in “Wolverine: X Men Origins.”

Knowles finally saw “Wolverine” yesterday, plopping down the whole price of a ticket to see the 20th Century Fox film. Only hours before that he complained bitterly on his website that he wouldn’t see “Wolverine” because Fox hadn’t shown it to him. He actually instructed his readers to skip the movie because the studio ignored him.

I’d say Knowles should be fired but he can’t be: he’s his own boss, a big fish in a very small pond. I guess the deal with AICN is, if Knowles isn’t shown a movie before it opens, it’s not worth seeing. If he has to pay for it, he’s not going to like it. And to get the studio pr people back, he’s going to give away spoilers.

In his review, so to speak, he complains about the make up and effects on a character not listed in the credits. I won’t spoil it by telling you who it is. But Harry does, name and all.

Knowles is a coarse individual who has routinely blackmailed the studios over reviewing their films early, giving away spoilers, and mocking just about everything in the business. He does this all from far away so no one can touch him.

Yesterday, he reviewed a review of “Wolverine” by the Los Angeles Times’s esteemed Ken Turan. He responded to Turan with these words: “F— you, Kenneth.” Nice, huh? Pauline Kael and Vincent Canby must be rolling in their graves. He marshalls all his “power” at AICN to destroy “Wolverine,” going so far as to report overheard comments from other filmgoers on the way out of the theater.

Fox must have really done something to Knowles to piss him off. And this is the state of movie reviewing now: if you’re mad at the publicist–the way The New York Post was at Woody Allen’s recently–then do what you can to kill the movie. Hopefully, this is just bottom of the barrel stuff.

Of course, Knowles is not really a reviewer. He’s a geek in a basement with a computer. He has no journalistic credentials. His former pretege is a guy named McWeeny. Really. For real.

So far, Knowles’s admonishments have had no impact. That may be because alexa.com ranks his website at number 5,679. “Wolverine” took in $35 million last night. It should make between $75 and $90 million by Sunday night. That’s pretty cool, ain’t it?

JENNIFER ANISTON LOOKS FOR MOVIE RESPECT AGAIN

Jennifer Aniston is trying to regain the indie respect she got a few years back for her 2002 Miguel Arteta-Mike White movie, ‘The Good Girl.’

So Aniston is about to open in ‘Management,’ a Stephen Belber written and directed feature co-starring Steve Zahn and a cast of mostly unknowns. Veteran character actors Margo Martindale and Fred Ward play Zahn’s parents.

This is the stripped down Aniston from ‘Good Girl.’ There’s no glamour in this offbeat love story that takes place in rural Arizona and industrial park, Maryland. Aniston is meant to look bland and somewhat unattractive. She’s either not wearing a lot of makeup, or wearing makeup that looks like she’s not. Either way, you can tell she means ‘business.’

For the most, the gimmick works. Aniston’s Sue, who sells tacky art to corporations, is emotionally cut off, and nearly misses the cues she gets from Zahn when she stays in his parents’ Arizona motel. Hence the awful title, since Zahn knocks on her door with a bottle of wine and introduces himself as ‘management.’ The come-on works, sort of, but not in a gauzy haze.

What ensues for Sue and Zahn’s Mike is the usual obstacle course to true love: missed opportunities, lack of mutual trust, a wealthy ex lover (Woody Harrelson) who comes back into the picture. We’ve seen it all before. The difference is that Belber plays it laid back and throws in a few curve balls along the way. Some of the obstacles are new, and the couple overcomes them with distinction.

Zahn is good in any movie, and here he plays the wide eyed loser a lot like Jake Gyllenhaal did in ‘The Good Girl.’ Mike is not terribly bright, he has no money, but he’s in love and he’s determined to get the girl. Charm goes a long way here.

For Aniston, ‘Management’ is no make-or-break release. It should have been sent into theaters either earlier this year or in August-September, though; mid May among blockbusters seems a strange time. ‘Management’ has all the feel of a Sundance movie, and probably would have benefited from being shown there. Instead, it was exhibited during last September’s Toronto Film Festival, on the same night as ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ and ‘Zack and Miri Make a Porno’ screened back to back at the Ryerson. The result was it got lost.

Aniston has exquisite comic timing, although she doesn’t get to show off it much in ‘Management.” This film will have its fans, but Aniston’s big career, really, should be in sunnier, romantic comedies. Her upcoming films, ‘Brand New Day’ and the still filming ‘The Baster,’ should do the trick. She needs dialogue from Nora Ephron or Elaine May, or even Woody Allen to put her over the top.

RIELLE HUNTER WON’T FIGHT BACK DESPITE ATTACKS

John Edwards’ former mistress and the mother of his illegitimate daughter is keeping her cool right now.

Rielle Hunter is not fighting back, at least, not yet, despite attacks by Edwards’s wife, Elizabeth.

Yesterday the New York Daily News revealed that Edwards writes in her new book, “Resilience,” about her husband’s affair with Hunter. Although Elizabeth doesn’t name Hunter, she calls her ‘pathetic’ and says Hunter is a parasitic groupie, according to the newspaper.

What Edwards doesn’t do is assign any blame to her husband for the affair, or question whether or not he initiated it. She doesn’t delve into the paternity of Hunter’s child, acknowledged by insiders as Edwards’ daughter.

Elizabeth’s attack on Hunter was not unanticipated. I wrote back on February 3rd” and on March 5th, in my old column, when I exclusively introduced this picture, that the word was out Elizabeth was gunning for Hunter.

But several things have to be remembered here. Most importantly, Hunter has never told her story or told it to anyone. She’s never sued for paternity. Although she did accept money from an Edwards supporter, she hasn’t received a dime from Edwards. Since December she’s been living in a friend’s home, wondering what her next move will be.

One thing is for certain: Hunter has no plans to write her own book at this point. But it would seem now that Elizabeth Edwards has the implicit approval of her husband to attack his ex lover and mother of his child. Hunter should get credit for biting her lip. In the weeks ahead, when Elizabeth Edwards is blabbing away on the publicity circuit, I think Hunter would have every right to change her mind.

BROADWAY NOTES: ‘9 TO 5’ LIVES ON; ‘WEST SIDE’ GOES EAST

Last night’s premiere of ‘9 to 5: The Musical,’ did bring out the stars including original movie cast Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, and Dolly Parton, the latter who wrote the songs for the show. Also from the cast, the original Roz, amazing, legendary actress Elizabeth Wilson, now in her late 80s, who looked great. Wilson first starred on Broadway in 1953 in the original cast of ‘Picnic.’ In 1972, she won a Tony Award for ‘Sticks and Bones.’ Her biggest hit was ‘Mornings At Seven’ in 1980-81. She’s been in dozens of movies, too, including a star turn in ‘The Addams Family’ (1991).

Also spotted at last night’s opening were Edie Falco, Kathie Lee and Frank Gifford, Connie Chung and Maury Povich, and Swoosie Kurtz.

This much you need to know about ‘9 to 5’: Allison Janney, who’s best known for ‘The West Wing’ but is a bona fide Broadway actress, is tremendously good in the lead role here. She dances and sings, kicks up a storm, and has a show stopping number at the start of the second act. Good for her!

‘Meanwhile, we await the Tony nominations next week. Yesterday, there was a lunch for the sensational principal actors from the current ‘West Side Story’: Matt Cavenaugh, Josefina Scaglione, and Karen Olivo. The setting was Susan and John Guttfreund‘s spectacular Fifth Avenue apartment, from which I now writing this column in one of their unoccupied bedrooms. (Just kidding! Can’t blame me for trying!)
‘This is what we learned from this attractive trio: the cast have all become good friends. They are exhausted from performing this demanding, amazing show. When they’re away from the theater, they listen to ‘a lot’ of music, none of it from the show! Olivo’s husband, Matt Caplan, is in Lincoln Center’s hit ‘South Pacific.’ They drive in from Jersey together every afternoon. Scaglione has only had time to see ‘Mary Poppins’ so far during her down time. Cavenaugh suffered from a mechanical malfunction during an early Broadway performance, cursed loudly, and was injured enough so that his understudy had to go on. They are all of them amazed by their director, 91 year old Arthur Laurents, who is still giving them notes after the shows.
”West Side Story’ should win Best Revival of a Musical. These three are headed to Tony nominations, and daresay, wins in their respective categories. And some stars are born’

MEL GIBSON: FOUNDATION CRUMBLING

Mel Gibson‘s girlfriend, Oksana Grigorieva, was reported last week to be a singer or a composer. All the reports, repeated endlessly, were that she was signed to Gibson’s Icon Records.

Well, there is no Icon Records. At least, not for Mel Gibson. There are companies called Icon Records, but they have nothing to do with the Oscar winner who made infamously anti-Semitic remarks during his 2006 arrest.

Indeed, Icon Productions, Mel’s film and TV company, is not in the record or music business at all. Check out their websites. If they’re in that business, they’re keeping it a very deep secret.

In fact, the soundtrack to Gibson’s “Apocalypto” was issued by Disney’s Hollywood Records. And the CD score for “The Passion of the Christ” was on Sony Music. You’d think if Mel had a record company of his own, he’d put out his own soundtracks.

There is an Icon Records, It’s a Canadian company, distributed through Unviersal Music and founded by someone named Rui da Silva. They have about a dozen artists according to their website at www.iconmusic.ca. But no Oksana. And no Mel Gibson.

So the question is, who is Oksana, and how did this story start about her being a recording artist? She has exactly one credit on the imdb: She’s listed as the composer of an unknown 2002 short film called ‘Flower Boy.’ There is no other information available about the project.

Oksana seems to be known mostly as the mother of a child fathered by ex-James Bond, Timothy Dalton. If it weren’t for the latest scandal with Grigorieva, Dalton’s name would have remained in obscurity. He’s appeared in almost nothing of consequence since his last Bond movie in 1989, “License to Kill.” Aside from his two Bond movies (the other was 1987’s “Living Daylights”) Dalton’s other biggest credit is having been Vanessa Redgrave’s boyfriend for about 14 years.

Grigorieva has had her share of press at home in Russia. Pravda’which used to be the propaganda sheet for the Soviet Union but now covers celebrities, of course– has written about her extensively. In a 2003 story that is awkwardly translated on Pravda’s website, the newspaper titled Oksana’s saga: ‘A story of a Russian girl who did an impossible thing: married a principal James Bond Timothy Dalton and gave him a baby.’ (It’s unclear whether Dalton and Grigorieva were ever legally married. But they do note he was two years older than Oksana’s mother. Gibson, a decade younger than Dalton, is at least closer to Oksana’s 38 years old.)

The epic ends with Oksana in a ‘civil marriage with a contract’ with Dalton, and her sister on her way to Hollywood ‘to find her own James Bond.’

Gibson, meantime, is loaded. One place both his divorcing wife Robyn and his mistress Oksana might look for Gibson’s hidden stash’People magazine has already noted that Gibson’s keeping Oksana in a house next to his’is his tax free charitable foundation, A P Reilly. This is the foundation Gibson’s used to fund his personal church, Holy Family, in Malibu on Mulholland Highway. According to its filing from 2008, A P Reilly now has $43 million in assets. That’s a lot for a church that serves about 70 people.

Luckily for Robyn, even in 2007’when Mel says they were officially separated’she was listed as Vice President of A P Reilly.

NEW YORK KEEPS BUSY

What’s going on tonight? Just the Broadway opening of the musical ‘9 to 5,’ for which Dolly Parton wrote all the songs. Expect Lily Tomlin, who was in the movie, to be on the scene with Dolly. Jane Fonda, of course, is busy starring in ’33 Variations’ herself on Broadway in what should be a Tony nominated performance’Downtown, at the Tribeca Film Festival, Sam Rockwell premieres in ‘Moon,’ directed by David Bowie’s son Duncan Jones (formerly Zowie Bowie) and written by director Alan Parker’s son. Trudie Styler is one of the producers, so this is a hot hot hot opening for Tribeca’And Magnolia Pictures is hosting a screening and very private after party for Tilda Swinton in her new movie, called ‘Julia”not the classic ‘Julia’ that starred Jane Fonda in 1977, but a new one that could have used a different title. Vanessa Redgrave will not be passing microfilm to Tilda in a hat during this ‘Julia”See how all these items tied together?…
‘Tomorrow, a little decadence: a whole afternoon of shopping and drinking courtesy of Sonya Rolin and Irene Zelinsky’s Traveling Atelier. Vanessa Noel Boutique is hosting the soiree at 158 East 64th St. with special guest designer Rubin Singer. Call 212-967-6900 for more info’

BEBE BUELL HAS A HIT AND IS SUNG ABOUT

Bebe Buell has had a lot of successes in her life, but she wasn’t prepared for this one: newly minted hit pop group Chester French has a single they’ve made in her honor. In “Bebe Buell.” the very popular pair of Harvard grads– DA Wallach and Max Drummey – sings a joyous love song to Buell, the knockout mother of actress Liv Tyler, best selling memoirist (the book “Rebel Heart”), legendary as a Ford model and Playboy playmate, and inspiration for the Penny Lane character in the great Cameron Crowe film, “Almost Famous.”

The timing of Chester French’s hit is serendipitous. Buell has always performed with her own rock band, and made a couple of well regarded albums in the 80s. But recently she and husband Jim Wallerstein and musician partner Bobbie Rae (of Twinomatick) set out to make a landmark CD, her own sort of “Broken English,” the album that cemented Marianne Faithfull’s career years ago.

The result is “Musesque,” a CD of songs she’s going to shop later this summer. Right now, the first single, “Air Kisses for the Masses,” is shaping up as a hit on ITunes and Amazon’s MP3 library. You can hear it at www.bebebuell.org or at myspace.com/bebebuellband.

The guys from Chester French, who are playing tonight in New York at the Steve Madden store and have a bunch of dates in the city over the next couple of weeks, are looking forward to meeting Buell. “She’s the gold standard in rock,” DA Wallach told me of Buell, for what was referred to in “Almost Famous” as muses. Buell’s rock relationships have included Steven Tyler, Todd Rundgren, and Elvis Costello.

“Air Kisses for the Masses,” though, shows off a tough pop sensibility married with a catchy hook and a strong melody. Buell’s vocal recalls the best of Faithfull, Chrissie Hynde, and Genya Ravan, all rolled into one. If they still had hit radio for people over 12, “Air Kisses” would be number 1. Buell and her band will debut the single and some more new material in May at the annual Joey Ramone birthday memorial in New York.

Chester French, meantime, is an oddity. They’re like the new, even cooler Weezer, or, if you’re old, Sparks, or They Might Be Giants.. (You can see the jolly, hummable “Bebe Buell” at http://www.interscope.com/artist/news/default.aspx?nid=21275&aid=587). Even though the group is pop rock, they’re Pharrell Williams‘ StarTracks label. DA told me the group was discovered by Kanye West, of all people. “Now we have a big hip hop following and we don’t even play hip hop!”

ONE CRITIC CALLS IT ‘DULL WITTED’

Regardless of the fact that it’s still all over the Internet in purloined form, “Wolverine” is getting clawed to death by critics.

Today, Variety writes that the Hugh Jackman blockbuster-hopeful is a “sharp-clawed, dull-witted actioner that falls short of the two Bryan Singer-directed pics in the [X Men] franchise.” Justin Chang also notes that “Wolverine” “bears all the marks of a work for hire, conceived and executed with a big budget but little imagination.”

Kirk Honeycutt, writing in The Hollywood Reporter, didn’t anything nicer to say:

“Bottom line: a keen disappointment as action and effects take over from a poorly conceived story.”

Of course, neither of these reviews, and two more on RottenTomatoes.com, say much for my own take on “Wolverine.” I liked the version I saw, but that’s another story. as they say. So far the’ New York Daily News and Arizona Republic also found the film lacking. Only The New York Post, Wolverine’s corporate cousin, seemed to enjoy this outing from Marvel Comics.

None of the reviews so far mentions the big surprise toward the end of the film. I won’t give it away, but rest assured, if you’re already an X Men fan, this will be a pleasant twist.

Even with the bad reviews, my guess is “Wolverine” will be howling at a heavy box office take this weekend. Will it break records set by “X Men: The Last Stand,” directed by Brett Ratner? Doubtful. But it’s going to do fine. I always chuckle when people take these comic-book based films too seriously. It’s just X Men, for gosh sake. As long as the story is easy to follow and there are plenty of explosions, sit back and enjoy it.

The real drama about “Wolverine,” meantime, is about the no longer asked questions: how did it get pirated in the first place? Who did it and why? What’s happened to the investigation? And why is it still out there?

JULIA ROBERTS DROPS HALF-DOZEN F-BOMBS AT TOM HANKS TRIBUTE

You do think of Tom Hanks as clean cut, and he is: married 21 years next week to Rita Wilson, father of four, winner of two Oscars, he is Hollywood’s good guy, for real.

But things got a little out of hand last night at the Lincoln Center Film Society tribute to Hanks at the newly renovated Alice Tully Hall. Several speakers had come and gone, all praising Hanks and relating anecdotes about working with him, when Julia Roberts hit the stage.

‘It’s late, I’m paying my baby sitter overtime, and I have to pee,’ Roberts declared at an all star audience that included Steven Spielberg, Mike Nichols and Elaine May, Bruce Springsteen and Patti Scialfa, Charlize Theron, Sally Field, Ron Howard, Julie Taymor, Jane Krakowski, Universal chief Ron Meyer, Sony Pictures head Amy Pascal, Geoffrey Rush, Jeremy Irons, Jeff Zucker, Bob Balaban, Christie Brinkley, Nora Ephron and more.

Roberts wasn’t finished. ‘Tom Hanks, what the f—?’ she announced, apropos of nothing except that playwright John Patrick Shanley, who’d just preceeded her, had used the f-word once, and in context. Roberts continued: ‘I’m wearing the same f’-ing dress as Tom’s publicist,’ she announced, showing off a summer dress to the audience.

A replay of a tape may show Roberts threw out a couple more verbal assaults before making this observation: ‘Sally Field played my mother in a film, too,’ she said to Hanks. ‘We’re brother and sister!’

There were plenty more tributes to Hanks through the two hour plus show which followed a no-press-allowed dinner for VIPS, celebrities, and the very wealthy in the all glass lobby of the new Alice Tully Hall. To keep gawkers out, the Film Society pulled down shades so the view was blocked. But enterprising photogs still got shots of celebs like Christopher Walken chowing down.

One highlight of the night was Springsteen and Scialfa, close friends of the Hankses, singing ‘Streets of Philadelphia,’ the Oscar winning song from the movie ‘Philadelphia.’

Springsteen jokingly told the crowd, ‘I met Tom Hanks in the bathroom at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion. We were comparing the size of our Oscars.’ The couple seems to have weathered that crazy divorce scandal story from a couple of weeks ago without any trouble. Good for them!

Springsteen continued: ‘He [Hanks] has that whole regular guy shtick perfected, which I’ve perfected myself!’

Several of the other speeches revealed a little about Hanks’s personality and movies. We learned that he’s a great mimic, doesn’t like rehearsals, knows how to give impromptu toasts. He cut at least two scenes with Charlize Theron from ‘That Thing You Do.’ And he and Spielberg evidently remade the script of ‘Saving Private Ryan’ as they shot it.

Clips were shown from several of Hanks’s movies except, oddly, ‘Sleepless in Seattle.’ And although Meg Ryan has co-starred with him in three movies, she didn’t show up for the event. One excuse might be that she’s a juror down at the Tribeca Film Festival. But there was plenty of time for Ryan to make it uptown and say a few nice words about Hanks.

In the end, though, it was Hanks who spoke most eloquently. In a longish acceptance speech, he was funny and poignant, and very eloquent. He recited most of the words of Springsteen’s ‘Jungeland’ as he reviewed all his toast-ers, fondly thanking Wilson and crowing about son Colin’s current run on Broadway with Jane Fonda.

He did not talk much about his difficult childhood (it wasn’t good), and warmly pointed out members of Wilson’s family. He said, ‘In the end, we become artists to overcome loneliness.’

During the dinner hour ‘ the one press was banned from’I ran down to the New World Stages to see Rosie O’Donnell‘s Broadway Kids put on one of their terrific shows. Outside the theater I ran into another Hanks alum, Penny Marshall, who directed the star in his career making hit, ‘Big.’ She also directed him, and Rosie, in ‘A League of their Own.’

Why wasn’t she up at the Hanks extravaganza? Well, she hadn’t been invited, no one had told her about it, Rosie asked her to help with the fundraiser. ‘And this looks like more fun,’ Marshall said. She wasn’t far from right.

Rosie’s show was a home run as usual, with the kids from her after school program now all headed to performance art programs and high schools. It’s some accomplishment. PS Rosie did some PG rated standup before the show started, and she ‘killed.’

‘I could stay on all night, I can still do it,’ O’Donnell roared. She sure can. Bravo!

CAT STEVENS DUETS WITH MCCARTNEY ABOUT DETAINMENT

You know Cat Stevens. He’s also known as Yusuf Islam. Well, he’s recorded a new album, a bonus single, and a stand alone video. He’s also about to make two ‘surprise’ appearance concerts, in New York and Los Angeles, to promote all of this.

Most interestingly, the single and the video directly address the incident in 2004 when Islam was detained by the TSA when he tried to enter the United States and was sent home. Later it turned out to be a case of mistaken identity. Since then, the Cat’who has numerous, hummable hits’has been in the U.S. many times.

The detainment song is called ‘Boots and Sand.’ It features vocal appearances by Dolly Parton and Alison Krauss, and more prominently by Paul McCartney. For some strange reason, the song is a bonus track only to Islam’s new album, ‘Roadsinger,’ which hits stores and computers on May 5th.

The video version of ‘Boots and Sand’ is available through ITunes and Best Buy. Islam says in a press release, ‘The song has an amazing story and background. I’ve made it comical, but it is, of course, the story about my ill-fated journey to Nashville in 2004, when I was confronted by seven tall FBI officers who stopped me and my daughter, interrogated me, and finally put me on another plane and sent me back to London. They kept on asking me to spell my name.’

Jesse Dylan, son of Bob, and once the victim of con artist Dana Giacchetto, directed the video. They filmed it in the California desert.

Meantime, Islam/Stevens makes his ‘surprise’ shows on May 3 in New York at the Highline Ballroom and May 11th in Los Angeles at the El Ray Theater.’ The single from ‘Roadsinger,’ called ‘Thinking ‘Bout You,’ was released yesterday and shot to the top of the Amazon.com Movers and Shakers chart. This isn’t surprising: it’s pretty damn good, very reminiscent of the best of Cat Stevens and still new enough sounding to attract interest.

By the way, did you know that Stevens wrote the classic, ‘The First Cut is the Deepest’? It’s the same song covered by Sheryl Crow, and earlier, by Rod Stewart. You can hear it on his website’www.catstevens.com’from his 1967 album, ‘New Masters.’ You can also hear another early hit, ‘Here Comes My Baby,’ from his first album, ‘Matthew and Son,’ also on the site.

WARNER (WMG) MYSTERY CONTINUES

Six of the top ten albums are from Universal Music. Two are from Disney. One is from EMI. And one, just one, is from the Warner M Group on Atlantic Records.

In fact, in all of the top 50, not once does the name Warner Records appear. Atlantic Records does, a total of five times. And Roadrunner, which had a deal with Warner that is now over, has two.

So how did Goldman Sachs’s Ingrid Chung arrive at her decision to make WMG ‘neutral’? That decision sent WMG stock soaring from below $2 to its present $4.63. Well, soaring is a bit much. But you get the idea. WMG is non existent on the charts. The stock price remains bafflement.

Well, the day of reckoning is coming fast: WMG’s next earnings call is May 7th. I’d like to hear one of those high paid analysts ask the WMG honchos just how it is they maintain a record company without any hits.