Friday, September 20, 2024
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Trump Declares: “We are a third world nation. We Are Literally A Banana Republic” — Anyone Agree?

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“We are a third world nation. We are literally a banana republic.”

Donald Trump declared this in a video below.

Does anyone actually agree with this? It’s insane. Has he ever been in a third world nation? Has he ever gone shopping at Banana Republic?

Seriously: his whole campaign is telling his base that America sucks. I can’t believe no one in a red state is offended by him. All the people Trump hates from third world nations flock here because it’s paradise compared to the rest of the world.

Trump would like to hypnotize his base into thinking America is one of his shit hole countries. Far from it. He’s so cynical he thinks he can get away this miserable outlook. Inflation is the lowest ever. The stock market is highest ever. We have air conditioning and dry cleaning. Viva USA!

Trump Flips Out on Social as Judge Merchan Keeps Gag Order, Won’t Recuse Himself — Again

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Donald Trump is flipping out on Truth Social, which is heading to a stock price low.

Judge Juan Merchan re-affirmed Trump’s gag order today, and also refused to recuse himself from Trump’s hush money case. Trump was convicted of 34 felonies and faces sentencing next month.

Trump wrote here that he’s not allowed to answer reporters’ questions. This isn’t true. Just not about the hush money case: “Judge Merchan just ruled that I, the Republican candidate for President, and leading in the Polls, am still under a Gag Order CONCERNING VERY IMPORTANT THINGS WHICH MUST BE BROUGHT TO LIGHT. I AM NOT ALLOWED TO ANSWER REPORTERS QUESTIONS. Can you believe this? The New York Courts refuse to act. This is happening right before the voting begins on September 6th. Suppression and manipulation of the vote. Voter interference. This is the real Fascist “stuff,” the old Soviet Union! So much to say, and I’m not allowed to say it. Must get U.S. Supreme Court involved. New York is trying to steal the Election!”

Merchan declined to step aside from the case and said Trump’s demand was a rehash “rife with inaccuracies and unsubstantiated claims” in relation to the judge’s daughter, and his ability to be objective.

Here’s the NY Times story today.

Katy Perry Career SOS as New Single, “Lifetimes,” 2nd Strike Out from New Album, Plus Possible International Incident

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Katy Perry made so much money on “American Idol,” maybe she’s not serious about her recording career.

This week, Katy dropped the second single, “Lifetimes,” from her September album. It’s a dud. Gone in a week. Now 99 on iTunes. Goodbye.

“Lifetimes” follows “Woman’s World,” the first single, was also DOA.

This doesn’t bode well for the album, called, strangely, “143.” The numbers 1 – 4 – 3 correlate into “I Love You.”

But what the heck is going on here? Today, the country of Spain in investigating if Katy and Orlando Bloom, her partner, shot the “Lifetimes” in a protected area of the country without permission.

The video’s plot is Katy and Orlando frolicking, having a great time, partying like there’s no tomorrow. They’re also jumping out of a helicopter and into the sea.

There doesn’t seem to be much thought about the marketing of “143.” Two dead singles should cause panic. Actually, the first one should have gotten Katy’s behind onto TV, performing her songs like crazy wherever she could. When you add in the controversy of Perry working with Dr. Luke as her producer, “143” is turning into a possible Jennifer Lopez like disaster.

“Deadpool and Wolverine” Crosses $500 Mil Mark in the US, But Loses Tuesday Narrowly to “It Ends with Us”

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They’re cracking open the Aviation gin at Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively’s house today.

“Deadpool and Wolverine” cracked the delicious $500 mil mark today, on its way to about $650 mil in the US.

That’s Ryan’s celebration.

His wife, Blake Lively, can crow that “It Ends with Us” took the number 1 spot on Monday and Tuesday, edging out “D&W” by a few thousand dollars.

Lively and Reynolds have gotten a lot of blowback for fighting with the “Ends” director, Justin Baldoni. Their PR teams have been on the move, trying to convince everyone that Baldoni is a bad guy. The result is a lot of publicity that’s probably driving some of the ticket sales.

But the real story has yet to be told. Baldoni’s been cut out of almost all the movie promotion. Sony did send him to Sweden, but to the London premiere or anywhere else cool. He and Lively obviously can’t be in the same room together. (If this a PR put up, it’s a mistake. But it seems true.)

I haven’t seen “It Ends with Us.” But you must read this review from Slate, the online magazine. It’s so perceptive, and cuts to the heart of this nonsense. Everyone’s fighting over a bad movie. But that’s how you sell tickets.

Beyonce’s Country Gambit Pays Off, Singer Scores Huge 12 Nominations for People’s Choice Country Music Awards

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Beyonce received 12 nominations this morning for the People’s Choice Country Music Awards.

Regardless of the bona fides of this latest invented awards show, the nominations for “Cowboy Carter” are significant. Beyonce has broken another barrier for Black artists. It’s a big accomplishment. She’ll win at least half of them when the CBS show airs next month.

Beyonce wasn’t the only Black artist to make an incursion into a traditionally all-white world. Shaboozey, who’s been on the top of the charts all summer. Shaboozey — whose real name is Collins Obinna Chibueze — is featured on “Cowboy Carter,” as well.

A couple of Beyonce’s noms are for covering The Beatles’ “Blackbird,” really for the vocals. The track used Paul McCartney’s original guitar playing from the 1968 recording, which makes it karaoke. Still, the voices are arranged very well.

Congrats to Beyonce. She’s a trailblazer!

2024 People’s Choice Country Awards Nominations List

The People’s Artist of 2024
• Beyoncé
• Jelly Roll
• Kacey Musgraves
• Kane Brown
• Lainey Wilson
• Luke Combs
• Morgan Wallen
• Zach Bryan

The Female Artist of 2024
• Beyoncé
• Carly Pearce
• Dolly Parton
• Kacey Musgraves
• Kelsea Ballerini
• Lainey Wilson
• Megan Moroney
• Miranda Lambert

The Male Artist of 2024
• Bailey Zimmerman
• Chris Stapleton
• Cody Johnson
• Jelly Roll
• Kane Brown
• Luke Combs
• Morgan Wallen
• Zach Bryan

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The Group / Duo of 2024
• Brothers Osborne
• Dan + Shay
• Old Dominion
• Ole 60
• The Red Clay Strays
• The War And Treaty
• Tigirlily Gold
• Zac Brown Band

The New Artist of 2024
• Chase Matthew
• Chayce Beckham
• Dasha
• Koe Wetzel
• Nate Smith
• Shaboozey
• Tucker Wetmore
• Warren Zeiders

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The Social Country Star of 2024
• Bailey Zimmerman
• Beyoncé
• Dolly Parton
• Jelly Roll
• Kelsea Ballerini
• Luke Combs
• Morgan Wallen
• Reba McEntire

The Song of 2024
• “A Bar Song (Tipsy)” – Shaboozey (Songwriters: Collins Obinna Chibueze, Jerrel Jones, Joe Kent, Mark Williams, Nevin Sastry, Sean Cook)
• “Austin (Boots Stop Workin’)” – Dasha (Songwriters: Adam Wendler, Anna Dasha Novotny, Cheyenne Rose Arnspiger, Kenneth Travis Heidelman)
• “I Had Some Help” – Post Malone feat. Morgan Wallen (Songwriters: Ashley Gorley, Austin Post, Chandler Paul Walters, Ernest Smith, Hoskins, Louis Bell, Morgan Wallen, Ryan Vojtesak)
• “I Remember Everything” – Zach Bryan feat. Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Kacey Musgraves, Zach Bryan)
• “Miles On It” – Marshmello & Kane Brown (Songwriters: CASTLE, Connor McDonough, Earwulf, Jake Torrey, Kane Brown, Marshmello, Nick Gale, Riley McDonough)
• “Pink Skies” – Zach Bryan (Songwriter: Zach Bryan)
• “TEXAS HOLD ‘EM” – Beyoncé (Songwriters: Beyoncé, Brian Bates, Elizabeth Lowell Boland, Megan Bülow, Nate Ferraro, Raphael Saadiq)
• “Wild Ones” – Jessie Murph feat. Jelly Roll (Songwriters: Feli Ferraro, Gregory Aldae Hein, Jason Deford, Jeff Gitelman, Jessie Murph)

The Female Song of 2024
• “16 CARRIAGES” – Beyoncé (Songwriters: Atia Boggs, Beyoncé, Dave Hamelin, Ink, Raphael Saadiq)
• “Austin (Boots Stop Workin’)” – Dasha (Songwriters: Adam Wendler, Anna Dasha Novotny, Cheyenne Rose Arnspiger, Kenneth Travis Heidelman)
• “Deeper Well” – Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Daniel Tashian, Ian Fitchuk, Kacey Musgraves)
• “Hang Tight Honey” – Lainey Wilson (Songwriters: Driver Williams, Jason Nix, Lainey Wilson, Paul Sikes)
• “hummingbird” – Carly Pearce (Songwriters: Carly Pearce, Jordan Reynolds, Nicolle Galyon, Shane McAnally)
• “No Caller ID” – Megan Moroney (Songwriters: Connie Harrington, Jessi Alexander, Jessie Jo Dillon, Megan Moroney)
• “TEXAS HOLD ‘EM” – Beyoncé (Songwriters: Beyoncé, Brian Bates, Elizabeth Lowell Boland, Megan Bülow, Nathan Ferraro, Raphael Saadiq)
• “Wranglers” – Miranda Lambert (Songwriters: Audra Mae, Evan McKeever, Ryan Carpenter)

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The Male Song of 2024
• “A Bar Song (Tipsy)” – Shaboozey (Songwriters: Collins Obinna Chibueze, Jerrel Jones, Joe Kent, Mark Williams, Nevin Sastry, Sean Cook)
• “Ain’t No Love In Oklahoma (From Twisters: The Album)” – Luke Combs (Songwriters: Jessi Alexander, Jonathan Singleton, Luke Combs)
• “Bulletproof” – Nate Smith (Songwriters: Ashley Gorley, Ben Johnson, Hunter Phelps)
• “Dirt Cheap” – Cody Johnson (Songwriter: Josh Phillips)
• “I Can Feel It” – Kane Brown (Songwriters: Gabe Foust, Jaxson Free, Kane Brown, Phil Collins)
• “Let Your Boys Be Country” – Jason Aldean (Songwriters: Allison Veltz Cruz, Jaron Boyer, Micah Wilshire)
• “Pink Skies” – Zach Bryan (Songwriter: Zach Bryan)
• “Take Her Home” – Kenny Chesney (Songwriters: Hunter Phelps, Michael Hardy, Zach Abend)

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The Group / Duo Song of 2024
• “Break Mine” – Brothers Osborne (Songwriters: John Osborne, Pete Good, Shane McAnally, TJ Osborne)
• “Different About You” – Old Dominion (Songwriters: Brad Tursi, Matthew Ramsey, Trevor Rosen, Zach Crowell)
• “For The Both of Us” – Dan + Shay (Songwriters: Andy Albert, Dan Smyers, Jordan Reynolds)
• “I Tried A Ring On” – Tigirlily Gold (Songwriters: Josh Jenkins, Kendra Jo Slaubaugh, Krista Jade Slaubaugh, Pete Good)
• “Love You Back” – Lady A (Songwriters: Emily Weisband, James McNair, Lindsay Rimes)
• “smoke & a light” – Ole 60 (Songwriters: Jacob Ty Young, Justin Eckerd, Ryan Laslie, Tristan Roby)
• “Tie Up” – Zac Brown Band (Songwriters: Ben Simonetti, Chris Gelbuda, Jonathan Singleton, Josh Hoge, Zac Brown)
• “Wanna Be Loved” – The Red Clay Strays (Songwriters: Dakota Coleman, Matthew Coleman)

The Collaboration Song of 2024
• “BLACKBIIRD” – Beyoncé, Brittney Spencer, Tanner Adell, Tiera Kennedy & Reyna Roberts (Songwriters: John Lennon, Paul McCartney)
• “Can’t Break Up Now” – Old Dominion & Megan Moroney (Songwriters: Emily Weisband, Matthew Ramsey, Tofer Brown, Trevor Rosen)
• “Chevrolet” – Dustin Lynch feat. Jelly Roll (Songwriters: Chase McGill, Hunter Phelps, Jessi Alexander, Mentor Williams)
• “Hey Driver” – Zach Bryan feat. The War And Treaty (Songwriter: Zach Bryan)
• “I Remember Everything” – Zach Bryan feat. Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Kacey Musgraves, Zach Bryan)
• “Mamaw’s House” – Thomas Rhett feat. Morgan Wallen (Songwriters: Chase McGill, Matt Dragstrem, Morgan Wallen, Thomas Rhett)
• “The One (Pero No Como Yo)” – Carin Leon & Kane Brown (Songwriters: Bibi Marin, Edgar Barrera, Elena Rose, Johan Sotelo, Jonathan Capeci, Julio Ramirez, Kane Brown, Oscar Armando Diaz de Leon)
• “you look like you love me” – Ella Langley feat. Riley Green (Songwriters: Aaron Raitiere, Ella Langley, Riley Green)

The Cover Song of 2024
• “BLACKBIIRD” – Beyoncé, Brittney Spencer, Tanner Adell, Tiera Kennedy & Reyna Roberts (Songwriters: John Lennon, Paul McCartney)
• “Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond Of Each Other” – Orville Peck & Willie Nelson (Songwriter: Ned Sublette)
• “Dancing with Myself” – Maren Morris (Songwriters: Billy Idol, Tony James)
• “JOLENE” – Beyoncé (Songwriter: Dolly Parton)
• “Perfectly Lonely” – Parker McCollum (Songwriter: John Mayer)
• “Sun to Me” – mgk (Songwriters: Zach Bryan)
• “Take Me Home, Country Roads” – Lana Del Rey (Songwriters: Bill Danoff, John Denver, Taffy Nivert)
• “Three Little Birds (Bob Marley: One Love – Music Inspired By The Film)” – Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Bob Marley & The Wailers)

The Crossover Song of 2024
• “Better Days” – Zach Bryan feat. John Mayer (Songwriter: Zach Bryan)
• “Cowboys Cry Too” – Kelsea Ballerini feat. Noah Kahan (Songwriters: Alysa Vanderheym, Kelsea Ballerini, Noah Kahan)
• “I Had Some Help” – Post Malone feat. Morgan Wallen (Songwriters: Ashley Gorley, Austin Post, Chandler Paul Walters, Ernest Smith, Hoskins, Louis Bell, Morgan Wallen, Ryan Vojtesak)
• “II MOST WANTED” – Beyoncé & Miley Cyrus (Songwriters: Beyoncé, Michael Pollack, Miley Cyrus, Ryan Tedder)
• “Lonely Road” – mgk feat. Jelly Roll (Songwriters: Bill Danoff, Brandon Allen, Colson Baker, John Denver, Mary Danoff, Nick Long, Steve Basil, Taffy Nivert Danoff, Travis Barker)
• “Midnight Ride” – Kylie Minogue, Orville Peck & Diplo (Songwriters: Christopher Stracey, Kylie Minogue, Marta Cikojevic, Orville Peck)
• “Miles On It” – Marshmello & Kane Brown (Songwriters: CASTLE, Connor McDonough, Earwulf, Jake Torrey, Kane Brown, Marshmello, Nick Gale, Riley McDonough)
• “My Fault” – Shaboozey feat. Noah Cyrus (Songwriters: Bailey Bryan, Collins Obinna Chibueze, Doug Walters, Nevin Sastry, Noah Cyrus, PJ Harding, Sean Cook)

The New Artist Song of 2024
• “A Bar Song (Tipsy)” – Shaboozey (Songwriters: Collins Obinna Chibueze, Jerrel Jones, Joe Kent, Mark Williams, Nevin Sastry, Sean Cook)
• “Austin (Boots Stop Workin’)” – Dasha (Songwriters: Adam Wendler, Anna Dasha Novotny, Cheyenne Rose Arnspiger, Kenneth Travis Heidelman)
• “Betrayal” – Warren Zeiders (Songwriters: Ali Tamposi, Blake Pendergrass, Jacob Kasher Hindlin, Justin Ebach, Warren Zeiders)
• “Bulletproof” – Nate Smith (Songwriters: Ashley Gorley, Ben Johnson, Hunter Phelps)
• “Devil You Know” – Tyler Braden (Songwriters: Graham Barham, Jon Hall, Sam Martinez, Zack Dyer)
• “Sweet Dreams” – Koe Wetzel (Songwriters: Amy Allen, Gabe Simon, Josh Serrato, Ropyr Wetzel, Sam Nelson Harris)
• “Tennessee Don’t Mind” – Kameron Marlowe (Songwriters: Charles Kelley, Daniel Tashian)
• “Wind Up Missin’ You” – Tucker Wetmore (Songwriters: Chris LaCorte, Thomas Archer, Tucker Wetmore)

The Storyteller Song of 2024
• “16 CARRIAGES” – Beyoncé (Songwriters: Atia Boggs, Beyoncé, Dave Hamelin, Ink, Raphael Saadiq)
• “Deeper Well” – Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Daniel Tashian, Ian Fitchuk, Kacey Musgraves)
• “Dirt Cheap” – Cody Johnson (Songwriter: Josh Phillips)
• “Pink Skies” – Zach Bryan (Songwriter: Zach Bryan)
• “Sorry Mom” – Kelsea Ballerini (Songwriters: Alysa Vanderheym, Hillary Lindsey, Jessie Jo Dillon, Karen Fairchild, Kelsea Ballerini)
• “The Little Things” – George Strait (Songwriters: Bubba Strait, George Strait, Monty Criswell)
• “The Man He Sees in Me” – Luke Combs (Songwriters: Josh Phillips, Luke Combs)
• “Too Good to be True” – Kacey Musgraves (Songwriters: Daniel Tashian, Ian Fitchuk, Anna Nalick, Kacey Musgraves)

The Album of 2024
• COWBOY CARTER – Beyoncé
• Deeper Well – Kacey Musgraves
• Fathers & Sons – Luke Combs
• Higher – Chris Stapleton
• Highway Desperado – Jason Aldean
• Leather – Cody Johnson
• Where I’ve Been, Isn’t Where I’m Going – Shaboozey
• Zach Bryan – Zach Bryan

The Music Video of 2024
• “Ain’t No Love In Oklahoma (From Twisters: The Album)” – Luke Combs
• “Austin (Boots Stop Workin’)” – Dasha
• “Deeper Well” – Kacey Musgraves
• “I Had Some Help” – Post Malone feat. Morgan Wallen
• “Let It Burn” – Shaboozey
• “Lonely Road” – mgk feat. Jelly Roll
• “Miles On It” – Marshmello & Kane Brown
• “Pour Me A Drink” – Post Malone feat. Blake Shelton

The Concert Tour of 2024
• Growin’ Up and Gettin’ Old Tour – Luke Combs
• Highway Desperado Tour – Jason Aldean
• One Night At A Time 2024 – Morgan Wallen
• Shania Twain: Come On Over – The Las Vegas Residency – All The Hits! – Shania Twain
• Stadium Tour – George Strait
• Standing Room Only Tour ‘24 – Tim McGraw
• Sun Goes Down 2024 Tour – Kenny Chesney
• The Quittin Time 2024 Tour – Zach Bryan

“Snow White” Actress Posts “Free Palestine,” Threatens Success of Broadway Show This Fall, 2025 Movie

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Actress Rachel Zegler will not keep her opinions to herself, no matter how unpopular.

Yesterday, Zegler — who became better known thanks to Steven Spielberg’s “West Side Story — Tweeted out one unpopular opinion: “Free Palestine.”

Zegler never says a word about the Israeli hostages taken by Hamas, or the innocent victims of the October 7th attack against Jews at an Israeli music festival.

This must have caused some friction on the set of Disney’s live action “Snow White” set for release in 2025. Zegler’s co-star is Gal Gadot, who is Jewish and from Israel. I can’t imagine the pair doing publicity together. (See “The Fabulous Four” and Bette Midler bailing on Susan Sarandon for the same reason. The movie disappeared.)

Zegler is opening on Broadway October 24th in a new production of “Romeo and Juliet.” The director, Sam Gold, is Jewish. So are many of the producers. If Zegler thinks “Free Palestine” is going to appear in her Playbill bio, the Jets vs. the Sharks will seem like tame business.

Putting on a Broadway play is costly enough. A Shakespeare play with an untested actress and a relative unknown as Romeo (Kit O’Connor) is an uphill battle. If Broadway and New York audiences sense that Zegler is antisemitic, the whole production could be in jeopardy.

Stay tuned…

Pop Charts: Kanye West’s New “Vultures 2” Album Annihilated by Taylor Swift Again (Ouch!), Plus New Finneas

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The predictions are in for Friday’s pop chart.

Taylor Swift’s “Tortured Poets” have tortured Kanye West.

The right wing, antisemitic rapper’s new album, “Vultures 2” will drop to number 11. Total sales for this week are approximately 31,000. On iTunes, “Vultures 2” has already dropped out of the top 20.

“Poets” remains at number one well into its fourth month, with 75,000 copies predicted for this week.

Mind you, 75,000 is not much for a number 1 album. The chart is stalled, and nearing an all time low. The new release of this week is Latto’s “Sugar Honey Iced Tea.” But that will sell the equivalent of just 26,800, all from streaming. Not a great success. (I do get Latto and Lizzo mixed up.)

The one album to get a nice bump this week is Billie Eilish’s “Hit Me Hard and Soft, ” thanks to the Olympics. Billie sang “Birds of a Feather” on the NBC Olympics finale, and the song went to number 1.

The next big release is this Friday, Post Malone’s country album. But I’m interested always in the amazing Karen Clark Sheard’s new gospel album, “Still Karen,” on August 23.

Also, Finneas — Billie Eilish’s composer brother, has a new single out. See below. The album is called “For Crying Out Loud,” arriving on October 4th.

Judge Rules Robert Kennedy Lied About New York State Residency, Really Lives in LA, Is Off the Ballot

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Just in case you didn’t hear it last night:

Robert Kennedy, Jr. will not be on the ballot in New York come election day.

According to the Associated Press: “Judge Christina Ryba concluded in her 34-page decision that the rented bedroom Kennedy claimed as his residence in New York wasn’t a “bona fide and legitimate residence, but merely a ‘sham’ address that he assumed for the purpose of maintaining his voter registration” and furthering his political candidacy.”

Kennedy said he’ll appeal, but he’s pretty much unappealing at this point. Kennedy is a resident of Los Angeles, where he’s lived for years since marrying actress Cheryl Hines.

The AP: “Ryba said evidence submitted in trial showed Kennedy had a “long-standing pattern” of borrowing addresses from friends and relatives so he could maintain his voter registration in New York state.”

“Using a friend’s address for political and voting purposes, while barely stepping foot on the premises, does not equate to residency under the Election Law,” the judge wrote. “To hold otherwise would establish a dangerous precedent and open the door to the fraud and political mischief that the Election Law residency rules were designed to prevent.”

Meantime, remember Kennedy’s 30 year old son, Conor? He’s the one who dated Taylor Swift while he was in high school. Conor, who’s 30, is one year out of Georgetown Law School. He works for a class action law firm in Los Angeles. Yesterday he announced his engagement to a Brazilian pop star hottie. They have matching tattoos. On Instagram, he identifies as the King of Madagascar.

Will Barron Take a Gap Year? No Word Yet as Freshman Orientation Begins at UPenn in 8 Days

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Barron Trump, 18, is the subject of planted, fawning press piece in the Daily Mail today.

It’s all about how Barron, who’s 6’7″, and his tiny buddy, Bo Loudon, 17 and still in high school, are advising Donald Trump about social media.

According to the Daily Mail, they’re geniuses. Meantime, no one has ever heard Barron speak. He was recently pictured in a golf cart, gaping while his father called Vice President Kamala Harris a “f***** bitch.”

What no one knows yet is if Barron will be going to college this fall. Trump has said Barron got into all the colleges he wanted to, but so far there hasn’t been one name of a school offered by the usually boastful 34 time convicted felon.

Two names that have come up in gossip are the University of Pennsylvania — where Trump went after his father helped him in — and New York University, so he could live in Trump Tower.

The countdown clock is running. UPenn has freshman orientation on August 21st. New York University has a mandatory first year student orientation on August 24th. Those would be one week and ten days from now, respectively.

My guess? The social media genius will take a gap year. The excuse will be the presidential campaign. Too much pressure, too distracting, and security is an issue. Barron will continue to lurk along the edges, unheard, and mostly unseen. By next fall, when Trump is well past losing the election, interest in Barron will dissipate.

After all, Barron was originally offered as a delegate to the Republican National Convention. But that plan was quickly rescinded. In the end, he wasn’t even at the convention. Aside from the golf cart, he’s been absent from public life.

Let’s not forget this classic Donald Trump post from 2023:

Broadway: Sutton Foster Channels Carol Burnett in Totally Silly, Very Funny “Once Upon a Mattress”

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Carol Burnett, who’s now 92, starred Off Broadway in 1959 in “Once Upon A Mattress.” Her performance as Princess Winifred, coupled with her regular appearances on “The Garry Moore Show,” made her a star.

Many years later in 1996, a pre-“Sex and the City” Sarah Jessica Parker acquitted herself very well on Broadway as the princess, who is also known as Fred.

Now Sutton Foster has taken on the role in a revival at the Hudson Theater. Winner of two Tony Awards, star of a TV series, most recently on Broadway as the prim Marian the Librarian in “The Music Man,” Foster is a living Broadway legend. Cadres of fans adore her, and won’t mind that at 49 she’s twice the age of previous Freds.

In “Younger,” her hit TV series, she was a 40 year old pretending to be 25, and it worked. Nothing has changed. As Princess Fred, Foster is such a pro she pulls it off. So does Michael Urie, 44 in real life, but a young prince who yearns to marry out of his parents’ — the king and queen’s — castle.

The songs are still by Mary Rodgers, daughter of Richard, full of rich melodies. But some things have changed: the book, all polished up and made very “Spamalot” like has been adapted by the great Amy Sherman Palladino of “Mrs. Maisel” and “Gilmore Girls” fame. Palladino has streamlined the story, put it in a logical order, and modernized it. (A couple is now pregnant without marriage. In the original they’d secretly wed.) If you recently saw
“Spamalot” you might think, for example, that Urie just moved over from that show in similar costume. The characters from each– dimwitted, coquettish –are not so different.

There are several other players who are highlights starting with Ana Gasteyer as the Queen. Gasteyer is a legacy player from “SNL.” so exceptionally talented but never found a post SNL path. She’s absolutely hilarious as the haughty queen,. complete with a sensational voice. The rest of the cast is top notch, and well known: Will Chase (who’s sort of the Lyle Waggoner for Burnett fans), Nikki Renee Daniels, John Patrick Kelly (who earlier stole (Into the Woods”), and Brooks Ashmanskas, and Daniel Breaker, — who I only know from “Billions” on TV, is a breakout star.

It takes about 30 minutes in Palladino’s version (and the terrific director Lear deBessonet) to get Foster out on stage. That’s how much she’s fleshed out the original, thin story. All the subsidiary characters now have back stories and quips galore. But in the end it’s all about Sutton Foster. She’s pulled from the best of Burnett nd Lucille Ball, including a scene that hearkens back to Lucy and the chocolate candies. But she’s updated their gifts so they blend with hers. Foster doesn’t have her signature tap dancing in this show, but her physicality is something we haven’t seen on Broadway in a long time. “Mattress” is supposed to be a limited run, but I’ll bet it goes on much longer.

And PS little kids and adults at my performance loved it equally.