The worst thing you can do is bury a friend, especially one who’s meant a lot in your life.
But on a cold, rainy afternoon in Miami, I was there to say goodbye to R&B legend Sam Moore, who passed away at age 89. Sam was so vibrant and filled with life and humor that his sudden death seems especially cruel.
I wasn’t surprised when the number of expected guests suddenly exceeding the seats at the funeral parlor’s covered outdoor chapel. A call went out for more chairs as the guests piled in including long time friends Gloria and Emilio Estefan, singer Michael Bolton with girlfriend Heather Kerzner, “Gypsy Woman” singer Brian Hyland, friends like Alan Abramson, who came from New York, David Spero, Ted Spero and wife H Leonard, Ray Charles Foundation chief Valerie Ervin, famed rock and roll publicist Joanne Geffen, plus Khalilah Ali — second wife of Sam’s great friend, the Champ, Muhammad Ali, and NFL Miami Dolphin hall of famer Larry Little, whose family grew up with Sam’s in Miami’s Overtown neighborhood.
Sam’s wife of 42 years, Joyce, followed a rabbi’s invocation of the Mourner’s Kaddish by speaking about their fabled four decade love affair. She was followed by daughter, Michelle, and grandkids Tash and Misha, all of whom shared hilarious, honest stories about their “Bubba.”
Little — a decade younger than Sam — recalled how their mothers were close friends, and how the athlete looked up to the Rock and Roll Hall of Famer. Ali surprised the crowd with a Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award from President Joe Biden in Sam’s name. The award came in a large folding leather cover and was accompanied by a medal that Ali placed around Joyce’s neck. There wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
At the internment, a 50 piece young people’s choir sang a piece composed by Quincy Jones’s protege, Jacob Collier, that made the little hairs on people’s necks stand at attention. In a nice touch, guests were given the kind of black sunglasses Sam wore during his Sam and Dave days.
I should clarify: we didn’t say goodbye to Sam. As Larry Little said, the sweet tenor voice that could sing literally anything and make it seem alive will go on forever. Even as I drove home from LaGuardia Airport Saturday night, “Soul Man” was playing in regular rotation on Sirius XM’s “Soul Town,” channel 74. Sam is just with another group of pals now: Sam Cooke and Lou Rawls, and Wilson Pickett, and Aretha and all his Atlantic producers like Tom Dowd (whose daughter, Dana, came with her mom), Jerry Wexler, and the inimitable Ahmet Ertegun.
Sam had no end of outrageous, apocryphal stories that he told all of us, repeatedly, over time. They didn’t seem true, but always proved out in th end. Daughter Michelle said in her tribute that she didn’t quite believe Sam’s memory of how Dr. King told the famous “I have a dream” speech. Sam said he was at the March on Washington in 1963 when singer Mahalia Jackson interrupted Dr. King and advised him to tell his “dream.” Of course, that is what happened exactly, Michelle told Sam she heard it in a documentary — and apologized for second guessing him.
(I balked when Sam told me actress Rita Wilson once sang back up for him, or that Christie Brinkley was his old friend. “Really, Sam?” I’d ask him incredulously. And then, yes, it was true, “See, Rog?” he’d say. “We go wayyyyy back.”)
I think of all the great adventures I had with Sam and with Joyce over the last 25 years, meeting Muhammad Ali, Sam singing “You’ve Lost that Loving Feeling” with Righteous Brother Bill Medley at an awards show, or when we all piled out onto the field at Yankee Stadium when Sam sent “The Star Spangled Banner” soaring before a Red Sox game. There are too many memories but they will live with all of us who knew Sam and loved him forever and ever.
Oh wait, the rabbi? No gentile clergy was available, but this rabbi sent Sam off with aplomb. Sam wasn’t Jewish, and it didn’t matter. He was a little bit of everything.
